Decisions... Help and Advice Please

I go to my oncologist on the 20th of this month , my surgeon thinks I may not have to have chemo , but  put on tamoxifen for 5 years. I am hoping this is what is going to happen. I had grade 2 cancer , only one lump and had all my lymph nodes and auxiliary removed.After testing 15 nodes they all came back neg. I  just did not want to have to go back in for another operation if things were not good ,so that is one of the reasons I chose a mastectomy. I was in hospital for 6 days and the pain was not bad, but after I came home the first week I had sleepless nights and had to get some pain medication , which the hospital failed to give me . I  now having remedial massage once a week and this has made a huge difference to the pain and movement in my arm, plus I do the exercises at home. The first 2 weeks home I was so tired all I wanted to do was sleep, b ut now feeling lot better, still get tired but not as much. Last Friday even went back to work for one day ,but I am lucky have a good boss really did not have to do anything except sell , I work in a dress shop and could sit down when I wanted. I am working 2 days this week , arm is still sore and can not raise it all the way up but I am managing, even started driving last Thursday . I find if I am just sitting at home I get depressed and become a mess, so I am trying to keep busy. First week I was home , it was the third day home, hubby at work could not drive, still very tired as I was not sleeping due to the pain , starting to feel really down, walked to the bus stop and caught the bus into town, walked around for two and a half hrs and caught the bus home. I was so buggered  , could hardley keep awake , but felt good inside.

 I am planning to have re-construction , but not till the end of the year, want to get over this first. I did not have an expander put in at  the  time of my mastectomy, which some people do. I am now doing research on plastic surgeons in my area and types of re-construction. I have just put up a blog asking the ladies about re-construction. I still have not shown my husband since my operation , do not know why as he has been so good, but just feel uncomfortable still at this satge. Take care Debbie