Day 32

Have to agree with you Annie. It's very easy on hearing the diagnosis of cancer to think it's the end of the world, a catastrophe. Cancer is a scary word! And of course it's not a great thing to happen but for those of us lucky enough to have caught it before it has spread it is definitely worth trying to keep it in perspective.

I must admit I had been feeling pretty sorry for myself since my diagnosis. Chemo hasn't been much fun and I've really hated having to lose my hair. But on the other hand I am now counting myself lucky that my nodes and margins were clear and I've only had to have a lumpectomy and four rounds of chemo. I've still got radiotherapy to go and years of tamoxifen but fingers crossed I should be fine after that. I know I will have to vigilent. Cancer is an insidious disease and you can never let your guard down. But I've got a good chance of a healthy future.

I guess my outlook on my situation was given a jolt recently when I met for coffee with a woman from this network who lives near me. I was expecting to encounter someone in a similar situation to me but was horrified  to hear she had secondary cancers in her bones and around some of her vital organs. I couldn't help wondering how long she had to live and it was very hard to know what to say. My troubles and suffering seemed so trivial on learning of her situation.  My heart really goes out to her and other women in that situation.

I guess the other thing is that having had this scare I will now pay extra attention to my health, my diet, my exercise and alcohol consumption. Perhaps in the long run I will live a longer and healthier life than I might have without  the diagnosis. Not that I wasn't fairly health conscious previously but this has definitely made me more focused on my overall well-being. So yeah, I'm tring to stay postive too.