'D Day’: First hurdle – surgery!

“Hey Darling, it’s 5.10 am, time to get up.” Tim said to me as he tapped me on the shoulder. I rubbed my eyes and dragged myself out of bed and headed towards the bathroom. Before jumping into the shower I took a look at my boobs in the mirror and whispered to myself, ‘well today’s the day that, you Mr Booby, are never going to be the same again.’ I wiped away a few tears and stood there and prayed for the best possible outcome, not much boob taken and no drains please. Showered, dressed and fed for the last time in many hours, we were in the car and on the way to the hospital. I was very quiet on the trip up and my stomach was churning like anything, Tim could tell that I was really nervous and took my hand for reassurance saying that everything was going to be fine.

Admission was straight forward and before I knew it I was getting changed into my lovely gown and then whisked away to radiology for the dye injection and scans. The staff were lovely and talked me through every step. I had been forewarned about the injection being painful, well they were right there. The first prick was fine, just like a local, but then the next bit took me way by surprised. Squeezing my fists tightly, gritting my teeth, humming to myself and the technician quietly saying ‘almost there’, I finally came down from the ceiling and the sting slowly started to dissipate. ‘OK, that was intense and not what I expected.’ Next thing, the technician says that if the dye doesn’t show up on the scans in a few minutes time we’ll have to do it again. ‘Hell no we are not!’ ‘Can you please put your hand here on your boob and start massaging your palm around in circles for a few minutes to spread the dye,’ as she covered me up with my gown. I had a giggle and blurted out, ‘well this can’t be a good look!’ They all had a laugh and one lady replied,’ we’re used to it.’ Back to reality, the scans were totally painless and went well, two nodes reared their ugly faces which was good. I returned to the ward after about 20 minutes, no hubby so he must be enjoying a coffee, there was now several hours of waiting. Fortunately, that time was broken up by a visit from the anesthetist, my brother and sister-in-law and the Breast Care nurse. She said to me that I looked much better then she had expected, recalling how nervous I sounded in our phone conversation two days ago, and brought me a gift in a Zonta pillow. After a lovely chat and well wishes she was on her way. At about 1.15 pm Dr Yeow came in. ‘Hello Sue! I have come to draw on your breast.’ That was funny and an uplifting moment that was only going to continue. She felt for the lump in my boob, glanced back at her notes and then said, ‘wow that is much smaller!’ The relief was amazing. Dr Yeow had fun, I think, drawing on me for what appeared now to be a smaller incision for the lumpectomy and reconstructive surgery. Obviously this was her plan but she did remind me that it could change and that we won’t know about the nodes until they are tested in pathology. I now felt so much more at ease about going into the operation but had to wait another hour or so before going through. After a goodbye kiss and hug from hubby I was wheeled away at 2 pm only to be left waiting in the holding area for a very restless hour and a half before being taken into the operating theatre watched on by smiling Dr Yeow and the anesthetist Dr Yim. I was soon hooked up to a pile of gadgets and sent off to La La Land and then woke up in recovery at 5.10 pm. The pain! The hand went straight to my boob to hold. ‘Are you OK’, asked a nurse. ‘No! I cried, I am in pain, my boob hurts!’ ‘On a scale from 1-10 how much does it hurt’, she inquired. ‘About a 6-7.’ I was told, ‘take this buzzer thing and press it each time the green light comes on, it will help to ease the pain quickly.’ Well that was a wonder drug, but little did I know that I would suffer from it a few hours later. Arriving back in my room I was greeted by Tim, my dad and step mum, (my mum passed away nearly 12 years ago from a massive heart attack) and my BFF and hubby. There were flowers and balloons everywhere which was lovely. I was feeling fine but about 30 minutes later I started to feel hot and nauseous. It got worse and worse, an ice pack was ordered for my forehead which helped for a while. Everyone quietly left except for poor Tim who very soon afterwards had to pick up the pieces. I was sick for the rest of the night, survived on very little sleep despite some nauseous medication being given, and still couldn’t face breakfast the next morning. Tim was back at the hospital again for more punishment. At about 10 am Dr Yeow came along and gave me the rundown of the op and said that it went well but that we won’t know anything more until all the results come through. She went on to say that we have an appointment with her on the 12th where we will discuss everything. ‘Now about you being sick, get arid of this contraption and things should start to improve.’ So there goes my buzzer thing, hadn’t used it that much during the night and morning anyway, so wow that’s what was making me sick! ‘Well, that will be a topic of conversation at the appointment,’ I thought to myself. Tim left me to rest some more after another bout and would return later that afternoon. So after one more episode and one final lot of stomach settling medication, I finally saw some normality returning. At about 5pm Tim returned, noticing some colour back in my face, and the dinner menu was offered. I settled for sandwiches although lamb rack sounded very tempting. The pain had settled and stabilised and it was nice to be able to chat and eat without resorting to the plastic bag I must say. A much better night’s sleep was had and the next day I was discharged to return home to my nice comfy bed and lounge.

It has now been nine days since I had the surgery, there are good days and not so good days. Sleep deprivation for one on some days and stabbing and twinging pain the other. My boob is still very swollen and tender to touch, but he pain under my armpit which wasn’t a problem before is now annoying me. The bruising around my boob has nearly disappeared but the bruising on my hand where the drip went in is still very prominent and painful at times. I will be seeing Dr Yeow on Thursday so will be quizzing her about these pains.

Now to wait and see what is around the next corner of my journey.