Sorry to see you here, @Emeraldgreen ... a 36% risk of recurrence is pretty 'big' in my opinion and personally, I would throw the bus at it! ... Did your pathology show any activity in the nodes at all?
Not all chemo causes hair loss - and wearing a Cold Cap may also reduce the amount of hair loss - and it pretty well always grows back after the chemo stops.
Your Oncologist has your best interests at heart and wouldn't suggest doing the chemo if they didn't think it would reduce your chance of recurrence - You could always see another Onc, for a 2nd opinion ... but be prepared for them to say the same - to do the chemo.
Do you have a Breast Care Nurse? Maybe you could have a chat with her.
Have you talked to your family about this, tho I know that in the end, it is your decision to make.
Take care & wishing you all the best