Thank you lovely ladies for responding to my call out! I am really struggling with this and reading your responses is helping me to see how "grey" this whole chemotherapy thing is. It is so hard to get a sense of risk from the available online sources. I had a really good talk with my Breast Care Nurse today (who is lovely and really helpful). She did some reality testing with me - I trust her views and I do understnad size is an issue but I really want to be able to balance the risks (which for me professionally are big). I am going to get a second opinion and try to find a Medical Oncologist who will talk through this with me and present positives and negatives, as well as absolute and relative risks in an unbiased way. Wish me luck and best wishes to you all with your recovery! It is really reassuring to hear there is a light at the end of the tunnel:)