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Vallerina's avatar
Vallerina
Member
9 years ago

Anyone else have single side implant .2 weeks till exchange surgery

I just got my letter this week. After right mx at the end of march and aeroform expander my right exchange is happening!!. It has been a fairly  uncomplicated journey so far. My nodes were negative so i didnt need any chemo, rads or even hormonal therapy. Hallelujah! The scars healed really well and recovery was textbook. But my dcis was 7cm (huge) so i lost my right breast. No choice no decision that was it. My story seems to be dominated by how freakin lucky i am that my dcis had not gone invasive and i am totally grateful for that. I really am. But I almost feel guilty grieving the loss of my beautiful double d  right breast, and the subsequent emotional and sexual  trauma i am suffering. I am a late bloomer to life spent most of my life hunched over with my arms folded across my chest trying to hide.  i Had only recently begun to feel beautiful and accept my womanhood.then my confidence was taken away by this diagnosis. I have a great but  workaholic partner that has been supportive  but i  didnt tell any of my friends about this so i have been carrying it mostly alone. Staying home a lot avoiding everyone.  Anyway it has been very traumatic. I dont feel like i can handle the bc support scene bc im fully cured already but i cant relate to my other friends either. I am getting a right side silicon implant and i hope my surgeon can get a good match to my natural side. He said he may be abl to make a nipple at the same time. He asked if i wanted the good side adjusted and i was like pretty much over my dead body is anyone touching my good side. My foob is numb dead and cold and i dont want to take any risks with my good side. My birthday is 3 days after the surgery and my first grandchild is due a week later so theres plenty to look forward to. I feel like ive just started to feel recovered after the last surgery and now its time for more surgery and   another 6 week recovery. But of course im grateful its all happening so quickly but at the same time its scarey. Sometimes i feel like the whole thing has been a horrible nightmare. I just stop and say omg what just happened to me.  And i feel like its so unfair but im also so grateful it wasnt worse. Sorry for the rant but i needed it. X

3 Replies

  • Zoffiel's avatar
    Zoffiel
    Member
    9 years ago
    There are so many decisions to make, even if you have a 'simple' version of the disease. Having more complex treatment is a pain in the arse, but this is not a competition; regardless of the details of your diagnosis it sucks. Hopefully getting the exchange out of the way will help you draw a bit of a line under the whole experience. There is bound to be a bit more tinkering about--but you will get to the point where you don't feel like your life is dominated by your boobs. Good luck, Marg
  • socoda's avatar
    socoda
    Member
    9 years ago
    Thanks Kath. Hey @Vallerina, I had single (left)implant after skin & nipple saving mastectomy last June.  Didn't have chemo or rads. My foob doesn't have much feeling apart from a sense of pressure, although there is feeling at the front sides of my foob. It's perky, its shape is sensational (round implant). I just had my first year mammogram and the technician was saying she couldn't tell which was not my real breast. I will be having a reduction of my right breast to even me up as my left is smaller since the surgery and I'll also be having some fat grafting to plump it up a bit as the implant has now softened and looks far more natural. So two perkies and a flat stomach woohoooooo. You can always have the other side matched later if you decide you want it Vallerina, that's the beauty of it. Wishing you all the best with your surgery, hope your as happy with yours as U am with mine. Xx Cath
  • primek's avatar
    primek
    Member
    9 years ago
    @socoda You might be of help here with your experience.