Acceptance
Although I got my diagnosis of liver metastaes end of December 2010, three lengthy hospital stays in four weeks rocked my world and the six chemo treatments absorbed whatever was left by way of time....
Forum Discussion
Thanks for such a quick response. I guess yours is the first piece for me in the online support jigsaw puzzle! Too many adjectives in that sentance! I have good family and great friends but they are all some distance from me because I travel a lot for work and so they are not close on a day to day basis. And I feel one moves into a different place with a cancer diagnosis from non-cancer people and it gets even more different with a diagnosis of secondaries.
I know what you mean about losing confidence - I felt like that for the first 6-7 years and then forgot all about it. And there is no answer to it but to feel what you feel, give it permission. I always got stressed on my annual scans, and end up just organising myself to be totally anxious on the days leading up to and on the day. Double deodorant days I called them!
Concepts like living in the present are totally true, just hard to practice. Buddhism is all about discipline and I guess that means discipline about wandering thoughts even one is weakened by the anxiety of diease. I am following your advice and writing down my thoughts.
Thanks Tonya