AC Chemo

I'm not sure if it's a bit more of a whammy from the 4th AC, school holidays and no structure, summer (finally) over, husband's renovations not going quite to plan, or something else but I seem to have hit a major brick wall in the last few days.  If I could run away from myself and everything else, I would.  I've lost any positivity and all I can see in the future is what's happening now, stretching into infinity and what's the point?  I KNOW that's not really true but I can't seem to shake myself out of it - or care (but I must be caring or I wouldn't have tears running down my face as I'm typing this).  I just feel like I'm going through the motions on the sidelines while everyone else has a life.  And I know that many of you are dealing with things bigger than I am and getting on with it so I'm sorry to be wallowing in my little pity trough.  It's probably just as well that I've finally got an appointment to see a psych on Friday - hope it's someone I can talk to.  
I know I've got support here and that everyone knows what it's like which is why I can let that out because I don't think anyone else would understand.