Forum Discussion

Anonymous's avatar
Anonymous
14 years ago

:-(

I am overwhelmed with sadness and totally shocked.......Tuesday's results revealed small cancer spots on my lungs. I am totally devasated and can't stop crying...I am secretly hoping to wake up from this nightmare....but i know this wont be the case. I am only 43 years of age, a sole parent with a 13 year old daughter....I am a good person....I have never drank, taken drugs, smoked etc, and no cancer in my family history. I have led a healthy life until breast cancer entered my life in 2008. I just dont understand why this is happening to me (or any of us for that matter)...it is just so unfair.

Bone scans will be done on Tuesday, with Psychologist appointment on Thursday to help me cope. Then treatment starts on 18th October. The spots are too small to operate on, so it looks like chemo, herceptin and a change of hormone tablets will be the go. I can only hold on to the hope that the new treatment will work, and the cancer will be controlled or perhaps I will even go into remission. I am so frightened and feel so alone, even though I have family and good friends to support me. I am terrified to click on the secondary cancer part of this site...for fear of what i might find there. At the moment my head is in the sand....I am totally in shock....

Thank you to all you wonderful ladies who have sent best wishes for my Tuesday 4th October results appointment...I wish I had better news :-( x

39 Replies

Show More
  • MandaMoo's avatar
    MandaMoo
    Member
    14 years ago

    Hi Celeste

    I am so sorry to hear your news - what an absolute bugger! :-(

    I too have walked in your shoes.  Cry, cry, cry - let it all out and then some more.  

    I was diagnosed with lung mets in June while on chemo treatment for early BC - I was 38 and have 3 small children - it isn't fair at all - you are not to blame.  

    As Amy said - the Hopes and Hurdles pack is a good start.  The psychologist is good too but if you don't like the first one, try another - until you find the right one for you.  

    There is much hope for those of us with Stage 4 disease - It sounds like you are Her2+ve - don't read the stats - they are old - there is so much research going on into Her2 disease and treatment and my oncologist talks about managing it as a chronic illness long term.  There is always hope - it will take time and there are lots of ups and downs - go with them.  

    we have a living with Secondary breast cancer group on here - it is private - if you search for it (I don't know how to provide the link) and apply to join you can maybe get some more information there too.

    Be gentle with yourself and reach out to all who offer support including us.

    Much love and light to you,

    Amanda x

  • Amy's avatar
    Amy
    Member
    14 years ago

    Hi Denice

    As someone diagnosed with secondaries in December 2010 it was really nice to read that you have been living with this illness for over 10 years. I love to hear stories like yours!

    Amy x

  • Amy's avatar
    Amy
    Member
    14 years ago

    Hi Celeste

    Sorry to hear your news.  I was diagnosed with secondaries in December last year.  My mets are in my bones.  It is all about living with a chronic illness.  You should get the Hopes and Hurdles pack - it really made me feel better.  It has positive stories in there - not all doom and gloom.

    I think going to a psychologist is a wise thing to do.  I've had 4 appointments with a psychologist and found that it really helped me to talk to someone outside of my family and friends.

    Keep blogging here.  We are here to support you.

    Amy x

  • Amy's avatar
    Amy
    Member
    14 years ago

    Hi Celeste

    Sorry to hear your news.  I was diagnosed with secondaries in December last year.  My mets are in my bones.  It is all about living with a chronic illness.  You should get the Hopes and Hurdles pack - it really made me feel better.  It has positive stories in there - not all doom and gloom.

    I think going to a psychologist is a wise thing to do.  I've had 4 appointments with a psychologist and found that it really helped me to talk to someone outside of my family and friends.

    Keep blogging here.  We are here to support you.

    Amy x

  • Chris's avatar
    Chris
    Member
    14 years ago
    Hi Celeste, so sorry to hear about your news. What an absolute bugger. I too have heard of many people doing well for many years as they are treated for this as a chronic illness, very successfully. Even my breast surgeon was telling me about some of his patients who are doing really well 12 to 15 years after discovering secondaries. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Love Chris xxx
  • Cheryl_D's avatar
    Cheryl_D
    Member
    14 years ago

    Dear Celeste,

    we are here for you when you go to those dark places that frighten you and can't talk to family and friends about so  you cry all you want and keep your head in the sand for a little longer if it helps you. When you feel stronger you will come out dring  the tears and shaking off the sand and do what you have to because you know how this works and you will fight the best fight you have, never doubt yourself, " no retreat and no surrender" is the motto I love for us women.

    Sending love,

    Cheryl, xoxo.

  • TonyaM's avatar
    TonyaM
    Member
    14 years ago

    I can hardly believe what I am reading and I am so sorry about your results.I am blogging here with tears in my eyes.It's so unfair,you've done the hard yards to get better and now this.It's the news that we all live in fear of.I can only imagine how scared you must feel.I think I would be crying and shaking as I did with my first cancer diagnosis.Ofcourse you'd be in shock and there is no avoiding these anxious feelings for now.As always with cancer news we become grateful for crumbs of good results and I hope your bone scans will be clear.The lung spots are small and can be treated so that is hopeful and  once a plan gets started you go into fight mode-what else can we do.I will be thinking of you and praying for you Celeste.Let me know how you go next week.It will be such an anxious time facing up to a bone scan and awaiting results.It's cruel,no other word for it.

                                 love Tonya xx

  • TonyaM's avatar
    TonyaM
    Member
    14 years ago

    I can hardly believe what I am reading and I am so sorry about your results.I am blogging here with tears in my eyes.It's so unfair,you've done the hard yards to get better and now this.It's the news that we all live in fear of.I can only imagine how scared you must feel.I think I would be crying and shaking as I did with my first cancer diagnosis.Ofcourse you'd be in shock and there is no avoiding these anxious feelings for now.As always with cancer news we become grateful for crumbs of good results and I hope your bone scans will be clear.The lung spots are small and can be treated so that is hopeful and  once a plan gets started you go into fight mode-what else can we do.I will be thinking of you and praying for you Celeste.Let me know how you go next week.It will be such an anxious time facing up to a bone scan and awaiting results.It's cruel,no other word for it.

                                 love Tonya xx

  • Denice's avatar
    Denice
    Member
    14 years ago

    I am sorry to hear your news.Once you have a treatment plan you will feel better as there will be less unknowns. Secondary disease is treated like a chronic illness.,....many people live for many years ...I have been for over 10 years....and I know women who have been for longer.! Be gentle on yourself.