Welcome @JenPritchard. It's a shock, isn't it? And believe me, everytime you think you're on top of it, each new step seems to throw you but the important thing is to look at it step by step. I was diagnosed at the beginning of December with lobular carcinoma. Since then I've gone from thinking it was a 2.5cm tumour with no node involvement to 2 surgeries later, a 4.5cm tumour without clear margins and 3 nodes involved. No sooner come to terms with that and I'm having to prepare for chemo. But you do get through it and the community here are wonderful. With regards to your kids, my advice is to be as honest as their ages allow. They will know things are wrong and secrets are often scarier than the truth. My kids are a bit older with the youngest being 11 but I have told them that I will tell them the truth as I know it but not the whatifs.