Hi Eastmum
So sorry that you are on this mad rollercoaster. Last Feb I was diagnosed with ILC in both breasts - I don't think that there are too many of us around. Mine too was difficult to diagnose- negative mammograms and ultrasounds despite physical changes. Eventually a biopsy was ordered and confirmed malignancy - ER/PR +ve and HER2 +ve. The tumour in my left breast was 10.8cm- I had 9 positive nodes. Smaller on the right with 2 positive nodes. All my bone scams and CT scans were normal so no spread- Yeah!!!! I had a bilateral mastectomy and bilateral axillary clearance followed by 6 months of chemo and 5 weeks of radiation. I am on herceptin until June. The final words that my Oncologist said to me on our first meeting were- "leave this office knowing that this is treatable and curable".
I can't say that the chemo was easy nor the radium but you do get through it- you don't have a choice. Try to not let your thoughts go crazy - easier said than done - I know. This is the hardest time- the uncertainty, the waiting. Once you know exactly what you are dealing with and have a treatment plan it gets easier. Remember a thought is just a thought- so if you are fixating on something - ask yourself- is this real or is it just a thought?
11 months on I am preparing to return to work,starting to resemble my old self. I am even considering reconstruction surgery. It is shit at the moment but you have a lot of living ahead of you. Be kind to yourself. Deb xxx
