You do get through this
Hi everyone,
When I was first diagnosed I was shocked and terrified, like most of you. Unfortunately it seemed that the news just kept getting worse. It was bigger than the mammogram showed, it had spread to my lymph nodes. Even though I had had a mastectomy I would still need radiotherapy after Chemo. My mind kind of shut down with shock and in this way I guess I protected myself and just coped with what I had to do each day.
Step by step I got through treatment thanks so very much to the wonderful friends I found on here. I had terrific support from my husband and daughters but really, only someone else who is actually going through this (or has been through this) can fully understand your feelings and needs at this time.
One thing that made my experience more scarey was the lack of good news stories about long term life after treatment. Where were all the survivors living a healthy cancer free life after treatment? Of course as I too left active treatment behind me (I am on hormone therapy, Tamoxifen at first, Femara since I had my ovaries removed last year), I realised that they were probably leading busy lives once more. But I became determined to pop back in and let people know that you do get through this and life can be good again.
So here I am nearly 3 years out from a Stage 3 diagnosis, just over 2 years from the end of active treatment and life is pretty good. I did wonder for a while if I would ever feel like I was normal or safe (from recurrence) again. Somewhere along the line (it is gradual rather than a single moment) I have regained my confidence to make plans and not let the fear of recurrence rob me of a happy now.
I know that life can change in the blink of an eye but I also know that,even when things get really tough, I can get through it. I have learnt to ask for help, to not take on too much, and that tasks are doable if you just take them one step at a time. I also learnt that when the going gets really tough there are some pretty amazing people out there who WILL help. I experienced so much kindness during treatment, much of it from complete strangers. I guess that gives me reassurance now, that even when bad things happen, there are good people willing to help you.
Look at this site. When someone reaches out there are lovely women (many going through the biggest challenges themselves right now) just ready to lift you over the hurdles that breast cancer keeps putting in front of us.
You will get through this and the more you reach out to each other the easier it is. Sending gentle hugs to everyone, no matter where you are on this roller coaster at the moment. Deanne xxx
