survivor guilt??

Wow Jecca it does suck I can't work out rhyme or reason I don't think there is any.  I've worked in major health disabilities for years co ordinated serious help and watched cancer ms motor neurone cf quads dementia brittle bone kids as young as 4 pass away mothers fathers everyone.  I've seen people in their 80s 90s still alive huge drinkers smokers so for me I can't make sense of it like you.  I've still not got all clear but I do feel guilty as you said life just goes on.  I haven't worked since July last year I've got 120 high need clients and 25 staff awaiting my return and at this point I can't wait to go back at least then I can help even though it makes no sense how and what I see I do know though that this crappy bc journey has given me more compassion and understanding and I fully intend to use that I find myself lucky at 50 to be diagnosed when I've watched so many that never made it much love