survivor guilt??

Around the time that I was finishing treatment a young friend (26 at the time) was diagnosed with Stage 3 melanoma. He had treatment and he and his fiancée (a nurse) set about transforming their lives. They changed their diet, saw a naturopath and were very positive about the future. 2 weeks before they were to be married some follow-up scans showed his cancer had spread. They had just found out that they were going to have a baby too.

They were told that there was no treatment that could help his particular cancer situation. He had somewhere between 3 and 6 months to live. I also had just found out that 2 other friends ( one was my age) had Stage 4 bowel cancer. The friend who was my age passed away less than 2 months after diagnosis, leaving a very devestated 16 year old son and an in shock husband. 

At first I also felt some sort of guilt too but then I thought about it a little differently. Treatment for cancer is improving and there are many people ( I may be one of them) who are alive today because of these improvements. 

Then we had wonderful news for our young friend with the melanoma. He was being put onto a new trial drug and after a few months the news has been nothing but good. Well over a year since he was told that there was nothing they could do he is not only alive but living very well. He has next to no side effects from this drug and life is pretty good for him, his wife and their 7 month old baby.

I have found it helped me to take part in raising awareness and funds for cancer research. In this way I feel like I can DO something about cancer and its devestating effects on the community. I can't cure cancer but I can help to raise money that will make a difference for others affected by it.

It is that belief that one day we will find a cure that helps me to feel less helpless, less disillusioned with the world. Take care. Deanne xxx