Something more or different???
I'm sure many of us have felt this way at some point in time during our encounter (for want of a better word!) with breast cancer, however I just can't seem to shake the feeling that I need to do some...
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Hi Annie,
I agree with you. I feel that I now need to live my life differently.....somehow. And not just being healthier, physically and emotionally, but that there needs to be some kind of 'shift' in the way I now move forward. I'm not as young as you (47) and do not currently have a partner (do have a 14 year old who tends to keep me on my toes!), so whatever choices I make are for me and my child.
I'm not looking to resign from my job and go and do something extreme, but there is that elusive 'something' that I have to figure out and make change.
It reminds me of when my Mum passed away in 2001 from secondary breast cancer in the liver. I was so angry that life just continued on, with little to no apparent change - when there was this gaping hole from someone who was no longer there. How could life NOT be different?
I consider my cancer diagnosis a wakeup call I guess. To put my self out there, stop existing and start living, give back to the community I live in and build the best possible life for my child and myself. I guess to be brave.
Looking your own mortality in the face sucks, but now having gone through this (7 more radiation treatments to go), it's going to make me a better person and the life I lead will be a better life. I don't have all the answers now, but to at least start THINKING differently will hopefully mean I will start acting differently and make different choices. And different things will then start to come to me.
Keep strong. xx