Thanks girls, you're all so wonderful. Nice to vent to strangers rather than talking about it with friends who will judge my husband when he's really been so good during this time.
i think the drunk thing is really annoying ATM. Don't get me wrong, I could party like the rest of them, but since treatment I obviously don't feel like it. Happy to have one , maybe two but not swinging from the rafters that's for sure. My focus has changed, I've changed, I want to get so much out of the diagnosis, I want it to become something good.
Maybe I want him to see this with me but how can he? It's my journey alone at the end of the day.
I get my back up as soon as he has a couple of beers, we are very social and have a lot of friends so it's not about him being at home cracking beers, it's always in company by the way.
maybe it's my issue after all.