Getting your confidence back

Hi Deanne I am so glad I read your post! At the moment I'm feeling as if I'm fighting a losing battle trying to get myself back to the way I used to be before treatment. When I finishing my treatment I joined the gym and started Tai Chi classes, Water Aerobics and Zumba, which I really enjoy. (I finished chemo in July & rads in September 2014) Well now I'm back at work and I am struggling big time both mentally and physically and I'm only into my 2nd week (I work 3 days a week). I can feel my confidence slipping away and I come home crying because I'm not coping. Maybe I'm not ready for work. It is very difficult for me to give in and accept that I'm not coping. I'm usually a fighter and I try to get through the challenges that life has thrown at me but now I'm so tired of it all. I continue to do Tai Chi & water aerobics because I look forward to the days that the classes are on, and it helps me to unwind. When I went through chemo, I got through it by living a day at a time and always stayed positive. But now after finishing my treatment I'm finding it so difficult because I think about my future, my life, the changes I should make, the fear of reoccurrence, wondering when will I feel normal again, etc. I know one thing, having gone through this experience has changed me. I try so hard to feel normal again but no matter what I do, my body just can't keep up. I do my best and plot along trying to deal with everything but sometimes it gets too much. I love this network. It has helped me through my darkest days and reading this post has made me remeber that I'm not alone and what I'm feeling is probably normal. Hopefully I'll start to feel positive again and regain my confidence back. Big hugs! Johjoh