The user and all related content has been deleted.

Pain got worse yesterday, as did my blood pressure. The drugs they give you for pain tend to reduce bp so we got into a vicious circle. Eventually the pain, like red hot pokers in my belly, drove my bp up enough that they gave me 5mgs of morphine. That took the edge off but nothing more. So then they gave me 7.5mgs of morphine and that was fantastic! Haven't needed it since.However my bp is still really low so a pathology team is about to come round to draw blood and see if it's a haemoglobin problem.I'm desperate to get up and moving, get the catheter out, shower & use the loo. Depending on the blood tests a physio should be round to teach me how to move. All this should have happened yesterday. This low bp problem has been the bane of my existence since chemo started in January. Gargh!Still, the foobs look good and I have a flat belly. All healing well on that front.The wifi is excellent and the food's good here too. Brekkie. Smashed avo & fetta on sourdough:

This is you ..... Just be patient with yourself..... easy to say hard to put in practice.

@sister not 1 person diagnosed is a wuss! everything is completely relative to each person, I too at your stage was exactly the same just getting through step by step, don't ever discount what you are going through or have been through. It really is so relevant to us as individuals. We have no control over the path we will travel, but I guess we have a say in how we try to deal with it...and that's very quietly and specifically what is best for each for us. The one thing to know is...that's it's not that you 'may' make it through treatment of any kind, there's a certainty that you will and surgeries etc., and you will get down the track and wonder how? I know I did. Im still amazed at where I am now and I would never have thought. I am back full time, yes it took me a few years to do as I had to learn to walk again. But one foot in front of the other and it doesnt matter how long it takes but things improve over time. xx

I did and what a heart warming, lovely and moving surprise! @Joannie you are such a thoughtful darling, as are the rest of you @Sister, @onemargie, @Finch, @Romla, @"Kiwi Angel", @iserbrown, @Hopes_and_Dreams, @lrb_03, @Zoffiel, @Janny54 and @mum2jj!!The surgeons say the operation went well. There was a hairy low blood pressure (of course!) moment in recovery, and I've moved from 30 minute obs to half hour obs so I've been able to sleep a little. There's quite a lot of pain on the belly and the side of my foobs where the bruising has started to come up. It's been held at bay by Endone, and they've just given me more because in half an hour I'm having a sponge bath!Have been having hot flushes all night... nothing stops them!Bless you all. Thank you from the bottom of my still beating heart. Kate xox

I did my best crying in the shower. The noise of the water muffled my sobs and howls somewhat, and the tears, snot (and occasionally a bit of pee too...I'm no longer young) went down the drain together. That catharctic mental picture of my sorrows going down there too was quite helpful/

Get Well soon Dear K. @kmakm | BCNA Online Network

168 Replies

onemargie
Member
8 years ago
@kmakm. I hope your feeling a bit better each day now. So pleased to hear you have a bit of an appetite too. And @AllyJay isn’t it amazing after adversity like yours how you can come on this forum and share your story thats truly amazing and bloody inspirational to be honest. No wonder you found the strength the get through this shitty disease. You already had balls made of steel.

And @sister. For fucks sake you are not a wuss. We are all different and there’s no right or wrong way to deal with or climb to the top of this shit covered mountain. Some of us crawl through it on hands and knees, some get lucky enough to run to the top practically unscathed, and others can get stuck face down half way up and need someone to help hold their head up, hold their hand and tell them fuck yes you can do this.

That love is why we are all on this forum, because there would of been at least once when we have all been there, face down covered in shit half way up and EVERY time it has or will happen there will always be someone to help hold your head up take your hand and help you to the top no matter what. Biggest hug. Margie. Xx
Anne65
Member
8 years ago
@kmakm Hi my lovely strong friend!! Sorry I have been "offline" for a few days so have a bit of catching up to do. I have been thinking of you so much. I have cried, laughed, smiled & sighed reading the last few days of your journey but most of all I feel so proud of you for sharing your days with us & allowing us to help you in some way. If I ever get this bloody disease back, I know all the ladies I will be needing help from, you included, to advise & guide me. I hope your pain, BP, temp are under control & you are feeling OK. I do hope each day is full of more smiles than tears & your strength both emotionally & physically are getting stronger each day. You have got over the worst I am sure, but realise that we are all entitled to a few tears & sad days now & then so long as we see the sunshine & rainbows soon after. Love, hugs & blessings to you xxxx
Eastmum
Member
8 years ago
@kmakm - Hi there Kate - how are you doing? xxx
MoiraC
Member
8 years ago
Dear @kmakm - so glad to read today that you have headed home. I was away for a bit and was wondering how you were and if things had moved on from those tiny steps post op and your pleasure at sitting in a chair for a bit. I hope being home goes well and you take it easy and don't try and do too much - warm hugs
Anonymous
8 years ago
The user and all related content has been deleted.
Janny54
Member
8 years ago
@kmakm I hope your first day home was relaxing. Now for the healing. Thanks for sharing your story.
xxxx
arpie
Member
8 years ago
@kmakm I think we need a HUGS button as well :)

Yes, it is incredibly emotive as you leave hospital ..... just take me it easy for the first few days at least as you’ll be amazed how tired you will be. Just rest up and let others look after you ..... xxx

Message sent.
Sister
Member
8 years ago
As much as you long to be out of hospital, back to reality is always a bit confronting. Hope you're relaxing and being waited on hand and foot!
SoldierCrab
Member
8 years ago
Thank you Kmakm for sharing your journey with us.....
Romla
Member
8 years ago
And Thankyou too @kmakm xo