Depression

Hi Jacqui,

Wow!!! i can remember exactly how you are feeling!!!

My husband is the most amazing guy in the world and he stood by me through thick and thin. He had to endure things a husband shouldn't have to see or do. They still have no idea what you go through though. Although they see it physically with their eyes they have no idea what;s going on inside.

I fell in a heap when it had all finished. I was strong and very positive until it all finished and I felt like I was completely on my own. I never saw a counsellor until I had walked away from treatment and hospitals. What a reality check it is.

My husband and I had a really big fight, screaming at one another, Something we had never done before. He yelled at me and said " It's over!" to which i replied "No it's not! It will never be over."

I don't think he realised how emothinally wrecked I was. Yes you worry every day and with every pain that you feel that you have cancer again, but it does get easier. I know you have probably heard that time and time again but it is true.

AS for your husband you are so right when you say, he is sick of hearing about cancer. It really does rule your world!! He will come around. You obviously love each other very much. He showed this by sticking around when times got tough,

Try and stay positive, I know it is hard at this stage but you truly have to keep on going. For your kids sake and your grandchildren and more importantly for you!Take time for yourslef, shout yourself special things that you might not ordianarily do. Eat that whole block of chocolate to yourself!

I am always at the other end of the keyboard if you need a chat.

Keep smiling Jacqui and chin up. things will get better.

Kate x