Oh Linda, wish there was something I could recommend that would make it easier for you. Your description reminds me how I felt except after the first round I also had a seizure and spent 5 days in hospital. I never wanted to go through it again but my husband said he would drag me there kicking & screaming if necessary! I am so glad of the support I got from family and my oncologist. They made me realize why I was doing this to my body and surprisingly, it got easier after that first time. A couple of days just sleeping and taking things easy on myself then by day 4 it got a lot better. Each day looked brighter. By the end of the 2nd week, I thought, I could do this. Still hated having to go through it every 3 weeks but knowing what to expect made it bearable. The second lot of weekly doses were easy after that and I was able to function normally each day. I hope my story helps you a little as I know everyone is different and the best thing to do is listen to how you feel and go easy on yourself.
Warm regards,
Corinna
