A blue day.

Sorry you are having a blue day. I think we keep ourselves going with this idea that one day we will be 'over' it and feel normal again. I remember the surgeon telling me that it would be 12 months before I would feel anywhere near normal. I find now (I had my last chemo 19 Sept) that I have quite a lot of moments where I feel normal, until I look in the mirror. Then I see a mostly bald, patchy eyebrowed, eyelashless version of me! Definitely not the normal me! I feel that people treat me differently too. I am pretty sure they think I am older than before. I used to have people say that I did not look old enough to have grown up children. No one has said that since I lost my hair! Every now and then it just gets too much to stay positive hanging out for that magical day when we will look and feel like we want to. You do start to wonder if it will ever happen. One of the firemen that attended the fire at my sister's house yesterday turned out to be an old friend of my Dad. He told me that his wife had breast cancer at 47 like me. She had 6 months of chemo and 6 weeks of radiation also. She is now 65 and fitter than he is! He looked pretty fit to me, so I guess I'll hang onto that hope that one day in the future I will feel and look better too! Sending a hug your way and keeping my fingers crossed that we all feel better soon. Deanne xxxxxooooo