Call me niggly but I kinda wish we had another way of greeting new members than commiserating their joining our band of ladies. I don't think we should celebrate anyone's bc diagnosis but could we lighten a newbie's load by just saying welcome or howdy or whatever is needed to make them feel comfortable that they have found support and understanding - it's tough enough having the diagnosis and reaching out to total strangers . The warmth and kindness you ladies showed me when I joined meant more than anything to me at the time - it didn't reinforce my sadness but made me feel safe.

I don't think anyone here "celebrates" a newly diagnosed lady. We are all here to support one another.

Hi @Romla, can understand your reasoning with that but I don't think anyone has taken the welcome to be a congratulatory message rather just what it is, a show of concern and understanding. I'm all for a way of acknowledging our newest but for the life of me can't think if a way to do it that doesn't acknowledge that they don't want to be here any more than we do. Xx Cath

Niggly, Oh I am sorry if you think we are being insensitive or similar in commiserating and or celebrating however, when you are greeting a stranger, who is reaching out, I would like to think the stranger is happy that we have invited them in with a welcome and an assurance that there are lots of us here with similar stories willing to make the lonely hours feel better amongst all the other emotions that comes along, especially at the outset!

There are a lot of ways to greet people. It depends on the individual I guess. If other women are like me, they might have read other posts before posting their first comment. This isn't really a place any of us wants to be, in the world of cancer and all that it entails. Acknowledging this doesn't make people feel worse. A simple hi is nice too. I also think it's where I'm at at the moment, but sometimes some forums can actually make you feel a bit down and I say that as a recent whinger. :)

@Cyhth6 @socoda.@iserbrown and anyone else who has read my post .My sincere apologies if I have caused distress by my comment - the relief I felt discovering this site when I felt lost and hopeless - it was a lifeline at a very low point. I did not mean to suggest anyone was being insensitive - to know you were all there and managing your lives as well as the practical guidance pulled me out of a dark hole I did not know how to get out of by myself. I am constantly astounded by this community - the support shown and acceptance of each other is quite special.

How should we greet a newbie ? | BCNA Online Network

15 Replies

Romla
Member
8 years ago
@Cyhth6 @socoda.@iserbrown and anyone else who has read my post .My sincere apologies if I have caused distress by my comment - the relief I felt discovering this site when I felt lost and hopeless - it was a lifeline at a very low point. I did not mean to suggest anyone was being insensitive - to know you were all there and managing your lives as well as the practical guidance pulled me out of a dark hole I did not know how to get out of by myself. I am constantly astounded by this community - the support shown and acceptance of each other is quite special.
Anonymous
8 years ago
There are a lot of ways to greet people. It depends on the individual I guess. If other women are like me, they might have read other posts before posting their first comment. This isn't really a place any of us wants to be, in the world of cancer and all that it entails. Acknowledging this doesn't make people feel worse. A simple hi is nice too. I also think it's where I'm at at the moment, but sometimes some forums can actually make you feel a bit down and I say that as a recent whinger. :)
iserbrown
Member
8 years ago
Niggly, Oh I am sorry if you think we are being insensitive or similar in commiserating and or celebrating however, when you are greeting a stranger, who is reaching out, I would like to think the stranger is happy that we have invited them in with a welcome and an assurance that there are lots of us here with similar stories willing to make the lonely hours feel better amongst all the other emotions that comes along, especially at the outset!
socoda
Member
8 years ago
Hi @Romla, can understand your reasoning with that but I don't think anyone has taken the welcome to be a congratulatory message rather just what it is, a show of concern and understanding. I'm all for a way of acknowledging our newest but for the life of me can't think if a way to do it that doesn't acknowledge that they don't want to be here any more than we do. Xx Cath
Cynth6
Member
8 years ago
I don't think anyone here "celebrates" a newly diagnosed lady. We are all here to support one another.

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How should we greet a newbie ?

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