Second post - WTF - not what I wanted to hear

Gosh, thanks so much everyone. Feeling slightly better today, and getting pages of questions for doc tmrw.  And going to do a bit more research this afternoon too. Knowledge is power. 

I went into my first appt adamant that I wanted a double mastectomy straight up but after discussing it with the surgeon, thought the wide local excision might be better as I could recover sooner and start treatment, whatever it may be.  Now I'm going in again, this time even more adamant that it will be a double mast.  Get the bastard out of me, once and for all. 

Frightening that I've had a mammogram mid last year, 2 ultrasounds, biopsy and another mammogram just before surgery and the pathology report found 5 tumors in all - and the original ultrasound only showed 2.  What the hell is going on with that!  Thank god I found it when I did!

My husband and i have been upfront and honest with our kids from day one, but this time I just thought I'd wait till tmrw after we talk to the surgeon and find out when I'm going in again.  Having said that though, today maybe we will just tell them what we know for now, that I have to have another operation.  I told their schools straight away too, so they are being fabulous.  And the kids have been wonderful so far - too much for them to go through but at 10 and 12, they all seem to be coping so far. Natural to worry about them too though.

I'm also so lucky to have the support of an A-MMAZ-ing friend who went through this 4 years ago - she's been a total rock and I'll never be able to thank her enough.  She's even offered to come to my appt tmrw, but we've decided we want to just go together for this one. 

And I know so so many others who have had varying levels of bc, and they are all still here, so I'll definitely be one of them, no question.

One day at a time.  Just a shame those days are going so so slow at the moment.....    Pls invent a machine that speeds up time!

And if anything good comes out of this, the support shown to me by family and friends is amazing and overwhelming at times. I'm so very lucky, funny to say that now, but I do feel truly blessed at times.

Take care all, and thanks for your messages of support - sending all positive vibes and love to you all too.  D