My name is David and I lost my beloved Wife suddenly on July 11 2011 to Secondary cancer. We were very close and to lose someone in their early fifties is so sad. What is so hard is nothing was prepared for this or expected. The doctors were shocked. What I can say is please organise your afffairs and pray they are not needed. From this sorrow I will be starting a group for oz men who have lost their partners to breast cancer and also a directory of things to be done, a checklist if you like in the event this occurs. My darling Nonie was so strong and a fighter and this is what I tell you ladies, be strong, optimistic, and keep fighting..Unlike my sweetheart you will win...!!!

Hi David This is Kathy from BCNA's Policy Team. Di has asked me to reply to your questions about deodorant and breast cancer risk. As you have found, there is no conclusive evidence that using anti-perspirants or deodorants can increase a woman’s risk of developing breast cancer. The US National Institutes of Health, which is the US government's principal agency for cancer research and training, has a fact sheet available on its website which talks about this issue. That is the best information I can point you towards. If you are interested in reading more about breast cancer risk factors, you might like to look at the Breastcancer.org website. This is a US-based website which we often refer to. It provides reliable, quality information. It also finds there is no scientific evidence that deodorants increase breast cancer risk. David, like so many others who have responded to your blog, I would like to extend to you my sympathies on Nonie's passing. Kathy

Hi David, I am so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family. I know it is true that we should prepare ourselves better and I know I should do it and I am actually re-evaluating a number of things to have put in place. Hopefully, I won't need them just yet, but as you say it is better to have them there. I think it is a wonderful idea that you will start a group for all the aussie men. There are so many things that they need to organise. I will be telling my husband about it and keeping an eye out for it. Again I am sorry for your loss and our thoughts are with you. Take care David. Tracey

I was so sad reading your blog.I am sorry this awful disease has claimed your wife's life.You give good advice about being optimistic but also prepared. I am 56yrs and had breast cancer for the second time last year.The first time was in 2003 and it was a shock but I thought it was a "one off".It was in the same breast again and classed as early breast cancer so hopefully I'm ok. But you just never know do you.So I am making huge changes to my life this year.My husband was a bit reluctant but we have sold our big 2 storey home of 22yrs and downsizing to a smaller single level one.We are decluttering and culling at the moment.I felt compelled to do this now, should something happen to me.I am also thinking of retiring from my job and after reading your words,I"ll do it.My husband has retired so we will have more time together. I think it is a wonderful idea to form a group for men who have lost their wives.Please accept my deepest sympathy to you and your family.I am thinking of you and your lovely,brave wife tonight and heeding your words. Tonya

I believe with a passionate unshakeable conviction that life is a blessed gift and that when these eyes see more, and this mind thinks no more and these hands now blogging are inert that where i go will be also a blessed gift. My darling also held these convictions. The reason i say be prepared is some egs.. Most things were in her name as i was always travelling on business. Some people you deal with are wonderful, some are pure crap. A demanding letter from the Roads and traffic authority for the return of her disabled pass (which she refused to use ) saying other people deserved it not her. A doctors office called yesterday wanting to know when i would pay her outsanding account (they knew she had passed) I hung up on them ! For your partners i am not a wimp yer i went to University but i also played Grade rughby league. If anyone wants to talk especially men contact me .

Leonie, I dont have all the answers but as Nonie would say travel while you are well ( if you want to). We also had $$ to think of, she was younger than yourself. I kept working in agreement with her, though her passing was sudden that is one of the hard things and is why i say just organise everything and keep fighting. As for society stuff them you do what you and your husband want to do . In life there is only health and happiness.... I can understand why men have trouble facing this but you would be surprised at the number of women i know who block it out, it wont happen to me attitude ??? ??As an aside Nonie's brother passed in April from cancer..

Stage 2 breast cancer | BCNA Online Network

22 Replies

TonyaM
Member
14 years ago
I was so sad reading your blog.I am sorry this awful disease has claimed your wife's life.You give good advice about being optimistic but also prepared. I am 56yrs and had breast cancer for the second time last year.The first time was in 2003 and it was a shock but I thought it was a "one off".It was in the same breast again and classed as early breast cancer so hopefully I'm ok. But you just never know do you.So I am making huge changes to my life this year.My husband was a bit reluctant but we have sold our big 2 storey home of 22yrs and downsizing to a smaller single level one.We are decluttering and culling at the moment.I felt compelled to do this now, should something happen to me.I am also thinking of retiring from my job and after reading your words,I"ll do it.My husband has retired so we will have more time together.

I think it is a wonderful idea to form a group for men who have lost their wives.Please accept my deepest sympathy to you and your family.I am thinking of you and your lovely,brave wife tonight and heeding your words.

Tonya
traxx65
Member
14 years ago
Hi David,

I am so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family.

I know it is true that we should prepare ourselves better and I know I should do it and I am actually re-evaluating a number of things to have put in place. Hopefully, I won't need them just yet, but as you say it is better to have them there.

I think it is a wonderful idea that you will start a group for all the aussie men. There are so many things that they need to organise. I will be telling my husband about it and keeping an eye out for it.

Again I am sorry for your loss and our thoughts are with you.

Take care David.

Tracey

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Stage 2 breast cancer

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