Seeking support and friendship
Hello lovely people, My mum was diagnosed with early breast cancer last Thursday. I felt a rush of mixed emotions and thoughts. I felt scared, upset, sad, and isolated. My dad passed away just over a...
Forum Discussion
20 years ago I was in your situation with my mum. It was an extremely traumatic time and I still carry the stress and anxieties that we went through together. My mum was 80 when diagnosed and I really don’t think she ever accepted the diagnosis. Last year I was diagnosed with breast cancer - what a bugger! Given mum’s age and my age at diagnosis (67) they don’t believe there is the genetic factor - all seem to put it down to ‘bad luck’. The last 12 months have been a very anxious and stressful time as I moved through the treatment plan, I am now in a pretty good place although am feeling somewhat anxious as I approach my 12 month scan. I actually think I coped better with my own diagnosis than that of Mum. It is so complicated when you are the support person because we have to respect the feelings and decisions of the other person. I remember saying to mum to write down all her questions and she was most upset with me because in her words, the doctors know best, and it is rude to question them! I was reluctant to ask my questions over the top of her.
My breast surgeon is private and I too ended up with about $8000 out of pocket expenses. My situation became a bit complicated and as a result was referred on to a public oncologist. I could not believe the level of care, compassion and treatment received by a large number of practitioners in a public hospital. I also felt guilty walking out and not paying a cent. The first PET scan I had cost me around $900, when I had the second 12 months later as a public patient, there was no cost. I will continue with my private breast clinic and accept there will be a cost involved, but I cannot fault my oncology care at a public hospital so will continue with this. All doctors are very happy about this and there is regular communication between them. They continually tell me it is the patients choice as to who they see, and it is important that this is your choice.
Make sure you take some time for you while supporting your Mum. The treatment plan seems to go on forever, and if you are anything like me, even the in between times were a constant worry for me as to how my mum was coping.
I lost mum 20 years ago now, but I have no regrets about the time I devoted to her at a time of great need.
My breast surgeon is private and I too ended up with about $8000 out of pocket expenses. My situation became a bit complicated and as a result was referred on to a public oncologist. I could not believe the level of care, compassion and treatment received by a large number of practitioners in a public hospital. I also felt guilty walking out and not paying a cent. The first PET scan I had cost me around $900, when I had the second 12 months later as a public patient, there was no cost. I will continue with my private breast clinic and accept there will be a cost involved, but I cannot fault my oncology care at a public hospital so will continue with this. All doctors are very happy about this and there is regular communication between them. They continually tell me it is the patients choice as to who they see, and it is important that this is your choice.
Make sure you take some time for you while supporting your Mum. The treatment plan seems to go on forever, and if you are anything like me, even the in between times were a constant worry for me as to how my mum was coping.
I lost mum 20 years ago now, but I have no regrets about the time I devoted to her at a time of great need.
I hope you also have a strong support system around you.
Best wishes to you and your mum.
Best wishes to you and your mum.