Feeling alone & overwhelmed

Hey poppetWelcome and so glad you found us.  Have you stopped to think of just how strong you are????  Because believe me you are!!!!  You have been to hell and back and hell and back so many times but you still come out fighting.  You need to believe in yourself because there is not many of us women who could have been through what you have been through and still have the courage to keep on fighting and reaching out for help.  I honestly do believe you are amazing.It defintely sounds like you are blessed to be rid of that weazel of a so called man.  I feel sorry for his poor daughters and his new lady.  You are so lucky to have him out of your life.  If it means completely disconnecting from him then I agree try and find a job away from anything connected with him but if you can continue to be the strong person you are then pick yourself up AGAIN like you have before and look him straight in the eye and tell him how you feel or if that is pushing the boundaries at least show him he hasn't won and hasn't managed to keep you down without you getting up to fight back. Show him you don't need weazels like him in your life anymore.  Some so called males are just sooooooo weak.  I am married to a wonderful man but yes it does get very testing on the relationship sometimes and I have been thinking lately that we don't laugh and smile and have fun like we used to but then BC can do that to you for a while but I am sure it will slowly return to our lives as my health/moods/pain etc. are under control and our relationship will return to normal but it does take a decent man and a strong caring man to hang in there and help you through.  If we BOTH want to put in a little effort we can get back to where we were.  You don't have that strong man to get you through but you are obviously blessed to have loved ones around you who have stood by you and helped you through.We all seem to get setbacks in one way or another in our recovery from BC and it is a tough road but you have ridden most of it and have nearly come out the other side to see that light at the end of the tunnel.  Keep on kicking your way through and you will get there I am sure.Now is the time that you can spend nurturing yourself and doing the things in life that will help you get better.  Exercise (yuk what a dirty dirty word but all I can say is it has helped me - very small steps to start and then build on it from there.  It is like BC survival in that it doesn't happen over night but it will happen).Like all the other beautiful pink sisters have suggested find a support group, find an exercise group (we have one through Cancer Council called Encore here in Perth and it is free and a good place to start.  You may have something different where you are but give it a go).  Water aerobics, walking, Curves ladies only circuit groups, any of these are good places to start.Just remember we are here for you and will support you in every single way we can  so you are not doing this on your own.  If you need to seek more councelling to get over this latest hurdle then do so.  If you are on anti-depressants which seems norm for most people these days not just the ones who have BC then I suggest you speak with your GP and change them or up them but they obviously need to be looked into more closely.  Keep on keeping on kiddo cause you are amazing and have done so well.Lots of love always, Mich xoxo