Anyone ever get sick of being their own science experiment?????
kezmusc
Member Posts: 1,553 ✭
I really get the shits with overthinking every so often. Things that "before" you would never have thought twice about doing, eating or cleaning your house with now make you second guess a lot of things. Obviously I am not the only one considering the amount of conversations that go on here regarding the do's, don'ts and what can we change that might help to stop it coming back. Looking for answers on what we did to bring it on. Self blame and guilt is still rampant no matter how much it shouldn't be.
BC is not your fault. That fucker broke in you didn't invite it in by living a normal life like millions of other people do.
I don't think anything I did brought it on, nor do I seriously think that anything I eat, drink or do will have much of a bearing on whether or not it reappears. I am a believer of dodgy genes, mutant cells,bad luck and not everything was nuked if it comes back. Will the tablets work? Maybe they will, maybe they wont. "May the odds be forever in your favour"
Mostly I ignore the over analysing thoughts, but every so often they creep in uninvited. I conduct clinical trials on myself to see if things help with side effects. Should I be doing that, I really have no knowledge of what interferes with what apart from what I can google which can have 10 different answers to the same question.
I had a cold...do I take vitamin C or not? Should I take any kind of vitamins or supplements. How the heck would I know. My levels are good so what is the point.
Don't eat this, don't drink this, don't rub that on. Will that interfere with the drugs? OMG I drank a bottle of wine, that shits definitely coming back now.
Eat soy, don't eat soy, not that I really care about soy, quite frankly I think it tastes like crap but you know.
Sweet potato is good for you, sweet potato is high in oestrogen, best not. Nuts are good for you, nope not today. Kale (gross) celery alfalfa, tofu, olives, olive oil, red wine. Great for your heart, nope, high in oestrogen. Eat meat, don't eat meat, don't dare grill it if you do. Flax seed and tumeric is awesome, uh oh, no not for you it isn't, too many phytoestrogens. Oh but hang on, in normal people they might help prevent cancer. Freaking strawberries and peaches are on the no no list.
The list is endless, confusing and mostly without any kind of definitive answers. Might, maybe, could do, possibly, we don't know. Pick any subject or food and you will find people raving about how fantastic it is and on another page how it gave you cancer.
Don't you drink that chamomile tea and don't you even think about smelling that fucking lavender
Blah. Ok I'm done.
Hugs to all.
xoxoxo
BC is not your fault. That fucker broke in you didn't invite it in by living a normal life like millions of other people do.
I don't think anything I did brought it on, nor do I seriously think that anything I eat, drink or do will have much of a bearing on whether or not it reappears. I am a believer of dodgy genes, mutant cells,bad luck and not everything was nuked if it comes back. Will the tablets work? Maybe they will, maybe they wont. "May the odds be forever in your favour"
Mostly I ignore the over analysing thoughts, but every so often they creep in uninvited. I conduct clinical trials on myself to see if things help with side effects. Should I be doing that, I really have no knowledge of what interferes with what apart from what I can google which can have 10 different answers to the same question.
I had a cold...do I take vitamin C or not? Should I take any kind of vitamins or supplements. How the heck would I know. My levels are good so what is the point.
Don't eat this, don't drink this, don't rub that on. Will that interfere with the drugs? OMG I drank a bottle of wine, that shits definitely coming back now.
Eat soy, don't eat soy, not that I really care about soy, quite frankly I think it tastes like crap but you know.
Sweet potato is good for you, sweet potato is high in oestrogen, best not. Nuts are good for you, nope not today. Kale (gross) celery alfalfa, tofu, olives, olive oil, red wine. Great for your heart, nope, high in oestrogen. Eat meat, don't eat meat, don't dare grill it if you do. Flax seed and tumeric is awesome, uh oh, no not for you it isn't, too many phytoestrogens. Oh but hang on, in normal people they might help prevent cancer. Freaking strawberries and peaches are on the no no list.
The list is endless, confusing and mostly without any kind of definitive answers. Might, maybe, could do, possibly, we don't know. Pick any subject or food and you will find people raving about how fantastic it is and on another page how it gave you cancer.
Don't you drink that chamomile tea and don't you even think about smelling that fucking lavender
Blah. Ok I'm done.
Hugs to all.
xoxoxo
Tagged:
13
Comments
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So true! I vote chocolate and hot chips for the win. They cure everything
Now, I just have to find (or be) the research to back it up.
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I'm with you @kezmusc. I try to control the sugar a bit but when the energy levels dip (as they invariably do) that goes out of the window. The alcohol is for occasions only but bugger it - I feel guilty when I savour that glass. You can drive yourself crazy thinking about things...mind you - no-one ever says don't go down the street because the exhaust fumes will get you.5
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Reading this post reminds me of a song called "Sign sign everywhere a sign" it's by the 5 Man Electrical Band
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OH NO! I LOVE sweet potato - we have it most nights (the orange one!) Love it to bits. I even do it as chips!
So so true, @kezmusc - you are damned if you do & damned if you don't!!
For every article that stuff is good for you, there are equal numbers of articles shooting it down in flames.
I am eating & drinking what I like (to a degree) as I don't want this fucking thing to totally rule my life any more than it already has.
I am exercising in my kayak, looking for & catching fish (I am not a gym person!) So I can be out there for 6hrs+, doing 1000 casts & pedalling all over the place ..... so good exercise & better still - I LOVE DOING IT.
We don't know what the future holds - just as we didn't know we were going to be hit with the bloody BC in the first place ..... so just get out there & do what you love doing. Just keep on doing it! If that means you want a bloody big steak & chips with a glass of beer or wine - just do it!!
Get as much enjoyment out of life whilst you can & fuck this bloody disease!6 -
It does your head in If u overthink it too much. Like u I’m more a believer in genes and getting this shit is just bad luck. I try to love the life that makes me happy but so it in moderation. Big hugs gorgeous xoxo4
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I don't give a fuck anymore.
I had my turn (and those of several of the more abstemious ) when it comes to all the things I know for sure I shouldn't have done. It's been a spectacular ride. What's the point of worrying about peanut butter and chamomile tea now?
I just want to keep the wheels going around, the lights on and the poo going away (assuming I keep producing any) until my need for essential service expires.
PS. I'm grumpy at the moment. I could change my mind and become a Paragon of virtue tomorrow. Pugs might fly. Mxx9 -
I was going to edit pugs to pigs. Flying pugs are more appealing. I'd pay to see that.15
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I know we are all different and what works for one etc and all that, when I got bc 1 I did all the good things, exercised, ate well, cut out the stress, read that as dumped the ex and moved to WA, took my tamoxifen religiously, no missed days no holidays, guess what, it metastatised anyway after 4 yrs so I was a healthy no stressed person who got it anyway, my point is all we can do is what we feel is right for ourselves the rest is up to our genes or fate or maybe I pissed the god of cancer off, who the heck knows.6
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So agree.
I've just think eat and drink all foods, mostly plant based...just not too much...and keep my alcohol down to no more than 4 per week or less and usually red wine.2 -
We can all overthink things - cancer can make us suspicious and wary. I think it was @kezmusc who once said that we all want more time but then spend too much of it worrying and fretting. I think I simplified a more complex comment but you get the drift. As far as is possible, the purpose of life is to be happy and make others happy.2
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I think it’s just some sort of genetic predisposition and then it’s random bad luck. Just enjoy yourself and your food. Eat the cake and the chocolate I say.Just don’t go overboard that it causes some other health problem.Sorry to hear your story Kattykit- that just sucks that you did all you could and the damn thing came back.I hope you are going ok- sending hugs to WA.4
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I can't complain, I'm feeling well, apart from what a lot of us go through with letrozole, feeeling like a 90yr old til I get moving in the morning, stable at the moment, there are lots worse off than me.3
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If I as much as LOOK at food I put on weight. I live with a very sedentary 87yo who eats far more than I do, and who moves far less than I do. Yet he never puts on a pound. I'm trying to lose weight because it's a risk factor in developing a number of cancers, inc bowel. I have an elevated chance of having that due to a gene mutation. Plus I feel better in my skin, and about myself if I am lighter. But I am tired all the time because I don't sleep well because of the hot flushes, which I have severely because of cancer treatment. I'm also often fatigued from Letrozole. Which I'm taking to stop the effing BC from coming back. It's a f*****g Catch 22. I'm doomed to failure. The energy required to maintain the mental discipline to NOT put the sugar in my mouth is massive. I can only ever manage short bursts. While cooking 'normal' food for my fast metabolism growing kids & inlaw. It is SO hard. And then I succumb to temptation. And then I'm consumed by guilt. Which makes me stressed. Which is also bad for my health. FFS you can't win! Breast cancer is a right royal total and utter mind and body f**k. GARGHHHH!6
