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callank's avatar
callank
Member
11 years ago

I don't understand my boyfriend's mom's TNBC diagnosis/prognosis

Hi, 

Thank you for reading this. My boyfriend's mother was diagnosed with 2cm, Stage 4, Grade 3 TNBC in May 2014. When she broke the news to my boyfriend she explained that she had 8 months to live and nearer to the end of her chemotherapy treatment (October 2014) she said that she might not survive Christmas.

A couple of weeks later I heard that she'd gotten the all clear and was cancer free, (end of October 2014). This was great news for all of us and my boyfriend was really happy and shocked too as he had mentally prepared himself for losing her. May - November was especially difficult on him as he is the eldest (24) and would do a lot for the family. 

His mom didn't have any surgery, no tumour removal or nodes. She didn't lose hair which I know is possible with some treatments. I don't know how often she had chemotherapy but I'm pretty sure it was chemo and I think it was 7 cycles.

I know I am probably wrong but something about the story doesn't feel right. Can anyone tell me if they have had an experience like this? 

Thank you and best wishes to all of you and your families,

Kitty

 

  • Deanne's avatar
    Deanne
    Member
    11 years ago

    If your boyfriend's Mum's cancer was Stage 4 this means that it had spread beyond the breast to other parts of the body, most commonly bones, lungs, liver or brain. Was your boyfriend told where, other than the breast, the cancer had spread to?

    This Stage of breast cancer is unfortunately incurable but can be treated successfully, sometimes for years, as a chronic disease. The treatment that she had may have shrunk the cancer for the time being so that it is no longer detectable on scans. This is why she may have been told she is cancer-free. Often called NED, no evidence of disease.

    Unfortunately the doctors can not tell how long the cancer may stay in remission. Stage 4 Breast Cancer will eventually start to grow again and then she may need further treatment to again try and shrink or control the growth of the cancer. Surgery is often not part of the treatment for Stage 4 (secondary) Breast Cancer. She would not have known whether the treatment was going to be successful until further scans after several cycles of chemo. Not all chemotherapy drugs cause hair loss.

    Hope this info helps. Your boyfriend sounds like a wonderful person, stepping up to help when his Mum needed him. I really hope that his Mum stays well for a long time but he may need to be there for her again when the cancer returns. Your support will help him through the tough times. Deanne xxx

  • Deanne's avatar
    Deanne
    Member
    11 years ago

    If your boyfriend's Mum's cancer was Stage 4 this means that it had spread beyond the breast to other parts of the body, most commonly bones, lungs, liver or brain. Was your boyfriend told where, other than the breast, the cancer had spread to?

    This Stage of breast cancer is unfortunately incurable but can be treated successfully, sometimes for years, as a chronic disease. The treatment that she had may have shrunk the cancer for the time being so that it is no longer detectable on scans. This is why she may have been told she is cancer-free. Often called NED, no evidence of disease.

    Unfortunately the doctors can not tell how long the cancer may stay in remission. Stage 4 Breast Cancer will eventually start to grow again and then she may need further treatment to again try and shrink or control the growth of the cancer. Surgery is often not part of the treatment for Stage 4 (secondary) Breast Cancer. She would not have known whether the treatment was going to be successful until further scans after several cycles of chemo. Not all chemotherapy drugs cause hair loss.

    Hope this info helps. Your boyfriend sounds like a wonderful person, stepping up to help when his Mum needed him. I really hope that his Mum stays well for a long time but he may need to be there for her again when the cancer returns. Your support will help him through the tough times. Deanne xxx

  • callank's avatar
    callank
    Member
    11 years ago

    Hi Deanne,

    Thank you so much for your clear explanation, I understand the situation much better as a result of what you wrote above. I really appreciate that!

    Thanks again, best wishes,

    Kitty