Still struggling with the word pre-cancer after DCIS mastectomy
I was diagnosed with low grade DCIS in my right breast in Nov 2019 and had a mastectomy in Jan 2020. I am 38 years old. I saw 2 specialist and both recommended a mastectomy because I am small breasted. Had an expander put in, awaiting for reconstructive surgery which has been postponed due to covid19. I am now clear without needing further treatment. My surgeon/breast care nurse/GP all refer to DCIS as pre-cancer and I struggle with this immensely because I need to feel that the choice I had made was justified and worth it. I lost my breast, it may be small but it was mine. This is not just about losing my womanhood, I felt I lost a part of me that made up the person I know myself to be. Because of this word I don't feel like I have saved my life, I didn't even have cancer. I know I should be grateful that I didn't have to go through radiation or chemotherapy or take any meds but to me a mastectomy is a very drastic treatment. How do you even explain it to other people? Nobody knows what DCIS is unless they have it, do I say I had pre-cancer? Is it wrong to say I had breast cancer? 5 months on and this is still keeping me from moving forward. At yesterday's Psychological Impacts webcast, someone asked Dr Tottman this very question and I was basically yelling at the screen "this is exactly how I feel!" So I now know there are others who are just like me. I hope to hear your stories and thoughts about how you are dealing with this particular issue.
Good-bye boob photos - your ideas?
I've spent a month wrestling with the information about DCIS, and my decisions about what to do next. Starting with a flyer for the BCNA, given to me by BreastScreen NSW, that seemed to indicate that DCIS is not straight-up, bald-faced cancer. I spent the first 2 weeks after diagnosis trying to get my head around concepts and terminology. Is it life-threatening? No. Does it mean you're more likely to get invasive cancer at some point? Yes. Can you sit on it, and see what happens? Yes, if you like playing Russian roulette. The next 2 weeks making appointments with specialists... A breast surgeon: get it out. A plastic surgeon: we have marvellous folding tables and can recreate your boob from other bits of your body. For my A-B cup delights? No thanks, way too much hassle. A doctor who has had a bilateral mastectomy: you don't want to deal with radiotherapy and chemo, get it out. My doctor friend who uses complementary therapy: it's about survival, and you're young with a lot of stressors in your life, get it out. A breast surgeon and top-level researcher: we can't force you to do anything but getting it out is the best idea. And so the expert consensus, even though I feel fine, I am potentially fine, and I may remain potentially fine, is that I should cut out my very small boob - including the 6.1cm of low-grade DCIS - and get on with it. So that is what I've lined up for later this month, even though a vain and fatalistic version of myself is writhing around inside me, clammering for attention so I can hear it scream STOP. On the pro-mastectomy side: - I'm small-breasted so this is not such a big deal in terms of lop-sidedness - Survival, maybe - I can take up archery with fewer complications - Maybe it's time to go #braless4ever On the con side: - I'm cutting out a boob - Scars, pain and zombie-time - Dressing myself might be a bit of a nuisance So you see, there are more pros. Anyway, as part of saying goodbye to my booby, I've planned a pre-surgery photoshoot. Candid, B&W, naturalistic in my home. Does anyone have any ideas for poses, props and backgrounds that would work? Or good places to look for inspiration? I've tried Google-Imaging but I don't like to spend too much of my life scrolling through porn sites... which is what happens when you search terms like topless, semi-nude, female body art. B) :s Thanks in advance!
