Have you lost a ‘friend’ due to BC?
I think that many of us have already lost, or may lose someone they considered ‘a friend’ before we were diagnosed with BC .... and it IS very hurtful and perplexing .... made more difficult particularly if you’d helped them thru a family or illness previously .... This is a thoughtful piece on the loss of a friend thru BC .... it is NOT YOUR FAULT! I Lost A Friend Today I lost a friend today. Not in the way you think. They didn't die. They disappeared. Something very unexpected may happen when you're diagnosed with breast cancer. Friends you thought would be there for you .... aren't. It can be shocking. Disappointing. Wounding even. A friend you would have thought would rush to your side after your diagnosis might send the standard "Let me know if I can do anything" text. But that's it. At least they made an effort, right? On top of trying to get your head around the fact that you have CANCER, now you are trying to get your head around the fact that the people you thought you could count on aren't around. For the record, it happens to EVERY ONE OF US. But WHY does it happen? There can be many reasons. Your diagnosis scares them, and they don't know how to handle that reality. If it can happen to you, it can happen to them. They may have been close to someone else with cancer, and for whatever reason, they can't find it within themselves to do it again. They are very insecure about their faith, their mortality, what they believe. And seeing you reminds them of their personal insecurity. They don't want to "bother" you or "wake you up." That's just their way to avoiding whatever emotions they're struggling with. It's classic avoidance. They don't want to "catch" your cancer. Yes, it's true. Some ignorant people actually think cancer can be contagious. But here is the TRUTH. The way your friend reacts is about THEM. Not YOU. It's hard not to take their reaction personally. But don't. It's THEM. Not YOU. But I'm here to share GOOD NEWS with you! There is a truly incredible thing that happens when you're diagnosed. People you would consider "acquaintances" step up to help. They offer to drive you to appointments. They make meals for your family. They leave cheery voicemails that you cling to as you sink into the depression that comes along with treatment. It's not easy to just open your hands to release the friends you "lose" because of cancer. But you should try. Because then your hands will be open to receive help from the kindness of the "unexpected others" ... the acquaintances who step up to help, the strangers who show you kindness, and the new friends you make because of your diagnosis. Watch for them. Written with love by Jan James, Hope After Breast Cancer
The Breast Cancer Trials Q&A event - Breast Cancer 2020: The Medicine, The Myths and The Mind
Hello all, I found the following online discussions very interesting, and somehow reassuring. Breast Cancer Trials: Research Update – Associate Professor Prue Francis Breast Cancer Myths – Dr Nicholas Zdenkowski Mental Health and Breast Cancer – Associate Professor Lesley Stafford Breast Cancer Recurrence – Professor Fran Boyle AM Videos of each presentation are available here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLfaKgjeYDhnVgXYeAwcURgWaUzJ_KkZ3e
what now
what a year last year was , breast cancer in May , a month or so later diagnosed rheumatoid /osteoarthritis , shingles for xmas and now bad fatty liver , go see a dietician the doctor says so im on the list , in the mean time i'm trying to figure out what i can eat and what i cant , i was told soya milk is bad for those with breast cancer ??
Breast Cancer surgery - the gift that keeps on giving
Hi all. Feeling a bit down about just being diagnosed with lymphoedema. Thought I had dodged that bullet, but alas, no. The Lymphoedema specialist gave me a booklet by Cancer Australia, but it lacks practical advice from women who have been there, done that. Lymphoedema affects my fingers, hand and arm. Grateful for any advice you might have. Also appreciate any websites or forums that may help. Thanks in advance, Nadine
