The wheels fell off my rollercoaster.
It’s been a while since I’ve had a bout of the blues but the
last week sure sorted that out. The worst one since a month after starting
Tamoxifen round 1.
I’ve been coasting along quite well for a...
Forum Discussion
I finished two years ago as well @Milly21
I think about cancer most days. Hanging out here probably isn't going to help me stop doing that. For me, there is a difference between thinking about cancer and worrying about it. It's everywhere. In the news, fund raising, people you know, advertising....
I suppose Ive taken the approach that I can't avoid it so I might as well stop trying. If I'm going to get 'triggrered' every time I see someone wearing a daffodil broach or walking down the street in a two year old Relay For Life top or wearing an ill fitting wig or a turban while sporting no eyebrows, I'm doomed to a life of perpetual anxiety.
Personally, Im hyperaware of every new ache or pain or any noticeable change in my body. That will never change, so I might as well stop worrying about that too. It's still stressful, but there is nothing to be done but try to live the best life I can.
I've got a date this mornng with a friend who's just found out her cancer is back. I'm finding that prospect a little challenging but this is not about me and while I'm feeling quite stabby right now I'll have to get over that in the next hour or two. It's not helpful for either of us.
I'm going to go for a 'jalk' then spend a bit of time smiting the wood pile. I'm so pissed off about all the things this disease has taken from me--its killed my friends and taken my freedom, destroyed relationships and completely fucked over my finances and my career. But what can we do? I try to channel my anger into doing something constructive but I'm not very good at it. Practice will make perfect? I live in hope. Mxx
I think about cancer most days. Hanging out here probably isn't going to help me stop doing that. For me, there is a difference between thinking about cancer and worrying about it. It's everywhere. In the news, fund raising, people you know, advertising....
I suppose Ive taken the approach that I can't avoid it so I might as well stop trying. If I'm going to get 'triggrered' every time I see someone wearing a daffodil broach or walking down the street in a two year old Relay For Life top or wearing an ill fitting wig or a turban while sporting no eyebrows, I'm doomed to a life of perpetual anxiety.
Personally, Im hyperaware of every new ache or pain or any noticeable change in my body. That will never change, so I might as well stop worrying about that too. It's still stressful, but there is nothing to be done but try to live the best life I can.
I've got a date this mornng with a friend who's just found out her cancer is back. I'm finding that prospect a little challenging but this is not about me and while I'm feeling quite stabby right now I'll have to get over that in the next hour or two. It's not helpful for either of us.
I'm going to go for a 'jalk' then spend a bit of time smiting the wood pile. I'm so pissed off about all the things this disease has taken from me--its killed my friends and taken my freedom, destroyed relationships and completely fucked over my finances and my career. But what can we do? I try to channel my anger into doing something constructive but I'm not very good at it. Practice will make perfect? I live in hope. Mxx