hi all - I have been looking at blogs on here along with the mountain of literature that I have been provided with and realise yet again how very fortunate I am! I'm 52 and have been happily married for 33 years - we have 3 grown up children and are quite close to all of them and their partners. My family would call me a pessimist but I prefer the term "realist" so why oh why is that I'm not "feeling" this thing called breast cancer??? I found a lump in my right breast, went to the breast clinic at QEH (Adelaide) and within 2 hours had been diagnosed with breast cancer... okay, shouldn't that be scary, shouldn't I cry... then staging was completed and I was again fortunate in that it was Early Stage - so within the week had had a partial mastectomy and sentinel lymph node removal/biopsy. Path results all clear/removed... so now 6 months of chemo ahead and then 6 weeks of radiation therapy... Why don't I feel anything??? It's as though I'm watching it all happen to someone else - those who know me think I'm "keeping it bottled up" - but it just isn't there? Am I missing something here??? Am I insane???

Hi LynnW ..... I don't think there is any right or wrong way to feel when diagnosed with breast cancer and going through the subsequent treatment. Perhaps at the moment you are so busy going through all the phases of treatment that you are just taking a day at a time. Perhaps also you are a little numb and maybe you will feel something more down the track - or maybe you won't. It seems however that you are worried about the fact that you aren't worried .... if that makes sense. Every woman's journey is an individual one and no-one can tell you how you should feel. Why not have a chat with one of your doctors about how you are feeling - or not feeling? Don't be too hard on yourself. It's your journey to travel in whatever way works best for you. I found I kept it all together pretty well during treatment. I became more emotional after my treatment; probably because during treatment I was so busy and afterwards I had time to reflect. All the best for your forthcoming chemo and radiation. Kym x

Hi Lynn Maybe you are in shock or maybe just haven't had time to process it yet?? I know I felt pretty numb going through BC....you tend to just do what the doctors tell you to do and go with the flow. It is only when you have time to sit down and really think about what you are going through that it really hits home. You will probably have your good days and bad days going forward, but hopefully you can stay positive and make more of them good days :) After all, it sounds like it was found early and hasn't spread so all good. Take care and if you ever need to chat we are all here for you, Louise

Hi Lynn, I was abit like you with my second bout of breast cancer last year.It was like here we go again.I went on auto pilot cos I knew I had to get through some pretty tough stuff.I think sometimes we hold it together while the crisis is on and then fall in a heap when it's over.I burst into a blubbering mess when I signed the chemo consent form.You never know what simple thing might trigger the waterworks.The numbness is normal but be prepared for emotions down the track.Best wishes - Tonya

thanks to you all for your reassuring responses... I've met today with the oncologist and begin chemo in a fortnight - been told that I have her2+ so having Herceptin for 12 months as well as 6 x 3 wkly cycles of chemo. Now I'm starting to feel less sure about my future. Although I was told that this makes it a more agressive form of cancer I didn't think to ask what that does to my chances of full recovery having previously been told that I had about 90%... the partial mastectomy biopsy showed a clear margin and no lymph nodes involved - who do I ask (now) or do I have to wait until going back in a week's time (when I have a "port" implanted)? I know that I might sound ungrateful but am beginning to feel really scared!!!

why don't I feel that this is serious?

13 Replies

louiseg
Member
15 years ago
Hi Lynn

Maybe you are in shock or maybe just haven't had time to process it yet?? I know I felt pretty numb going through BC....you tend to just do what the doctors tell you to do and go with the flow. It is only when you have time to sit down and really think about what you are going through that it really hits home.

You will probably have your good days and bad days going forward, but hopefully you can stay positive and make more of them good days :) After all, it sounds like it was found early and hasn't spread so all good.

Take care and if you ever need to chat we are all here for you,

Louise
louiseg
Member
15 years ago
Hi Lynn

Maybe you are in shock or maybe just haven't had time to process it yet?? I know I felt pretty numb going through BC....you tend to just do what the doctors tell you to do and go with the flow. It is only when you have time to sit down and really think about what you are going through that it really hits home.

You will probably have your good days and bad days going forward, but hopefully you can stay positive and make more of them good days :) After all, it sounds like it was found early and hasn't spread so all good.

Take care and if you ever need to chat we are all here for you,

Louise
KymB
Member
15 years ago
Hi LynnW ..... I don't think there is any right or wrong way to feel when diagnosed with breast cancer and going through the subsequent treatment. Perhaps at the moment you are so busy going through all the phases of treatment that you are just taking a day at a time. Perhaps also you are a little numb and maybe you will feel something more down the track - or maybe you won't. It seems however that you are worried about the fact that you aren't worried .... if that makes sense. Every woman's journey is an individual one and no-one can tell you how you should feel. Why not have a chat with one of your doctors about how you are feeling - or not feeling? Don't be too hard on yourself. It's your journey to travel in whatever way works best for you. I found I kept it all together pretty well during treatment. I became more emotional after my treatment; probably because during treatment I was so busy and afterwards I had time to reflect. All the best for your forthcoming chemo and radiation. Kym x

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why don't I feel that this is serious?

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