Writing therapy
I've recently confronted some bad behaviour from a so-called friend and my way of processing it is to write. I'd like some feedback if you feel able. https://medium.com/@jecmap/no-you-dont-get-to-us...
Forum Discussion
Hi @Jax1964 - I write for a living and I think you've done a fabulous job in describing exactly what you feel.
I particularly related to this bit: The first lesson when you get cancer — you have to learn to deal with other people’s inability to deal with it!
Oh yeah baby! There's a whole range of things I could write about that one!
What I think has stopped me in my tracks from lashing out at people along that way though, is that I honestly believe that (apart from a few truly revolting individuals) the majority of people out there genuinely feel that they are doing the right thing, and genuinely come from a place of good intent.
Whether or not they put their foot in their mouths, totally fuck it up, upset us, leave us incredulous etc - in their minds, they're doing the right thing.
I've had a few really close friends call me up and lay it on the line saying 'I have no idea how to help you or what to say. Please tell me what my role is in your journey and how I can best support you' - and as honest as this is, I've been a bit taken a back wondering why I have to explain it to them - and then I think - yeah, OK maybe I've been giving out mixed messages. So I guess it's really a bit of a learning curve for everyone and sometimes people don't know you want to be invited out for a night out unless you tell them you're up for it, or maybe they say the wrong thing only because they feel the need to say something but they're clueless about what to say.
And then again, there are plenty of those people that just really don't get it - don't waste your time worrying about them - they never will
x:smile:
xxxxx
I particularly related to this bit: The first lesson when you get cancer — you have to learn to deal with other people’s inability to deal with it!
Oh yeah baby! There's a whole range of things I could write about that one!
What I think has stopped me in my tracks from lashing out at people along that way though, is that I honestly believe that (apart from a few truly revolting individuals) the majority of people out there genuinely feel that they are doing the right thing, and genuinely come from a place of good intent.
Whether or not they put their foot in their mouths, totally fuck it up, upset us, leave us incredulous etc - in their minds, they're doing the right thing.
I've had a few really close friends call me up and lay it on the line saying 'I have no idea how to help you or what to say. Please tell me what my role is in your journey and how I can best support you' - and as honest as this is, I've been a bit taken a back wondering why I have to explain it to them - and then I think - yeah, OK maybe I've been giving out mixed messages. So I guess it's really a bit of a learning curve for everyone and sometimes people don't know you want to be invited out for a night out unless you tell them you're up for it, or maybe they say the wrong thing only because they feel the need to say something but they're clueless about what to say.
And then again, there are plenty of those people that just really don't get it - don't waste your time worrying about them - they never will
x:smile:
xxxxx