Newbie finding her feet

Hi Donna, 

Im really sorry you got to join our club but let me extend you the warmest welcome. Here you will find a safe place to talk about stuff you don't feel OK to say to anyone else. There is always someone with a warm heart and kind word. And it's OK to say "shit"....

My diagnosis was in November and I felt quite similar to you. It was all very surreal and I felt quite numb. Even now after two rounds of surgery, my first round of chemo and having to shave my head yesterday, it still - mostly - feels like I'm reading about it. I have had more than my fair share of moments when I've cried and spoked and sulked. But mostly it still feels distant. I had very few questions to ask and the first two months I felt like I was in a riptide. No way out, no control and no sense of time. This may or may not change for you. But whatever way it is, it's ok and normal. If only there was a handbook (Christ knows you get hundreds of them) to tell us the right way to feel but we each have to figure that out on our own terms.

My only advice to you is this: be kind to yourself. This doesn't seem like much now but in the coming months this will be most important. Be kind, be gentle, be fair. If you are tired, rest. If you want a second piece of cake, eat it! Now is not the time for self deprivation. I only learnt this past week that the universe will continue to operate if I check out for a couple of hours.

This network has been my saviour so never be frightened to ask questions - there are far too many of us here and I guarantee that someone will be able to answer just about anything.

Take care and good luck xo