Just an observation:)
Hello ladies, was just doing some thinking today, you know how it is. All of my family and friends have been so supportive since I was diagnosed with BC. There have been a couple of friends, not perh...
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I think most people treat us differently with the best of intentions. They act out of concern rather than with any ill intentions. Some people avoid me because they simply don't want to say or do the wrong thing.
I have noticed that if I am out with family or friends and I am wearing a scarf or turban hat, shop assistants or waitresses will often look and talk with whoever I am with rather than me. You start to feel a bit invisible and feel like saying 'hey I'm here too!'.
The reality is that BC effects our relationships with others just as it effects a lot of other aspects of our lives. Sometimes I feel angry with others because they don't seem to consider what it is like to miss out on so much for so long. I have had a few meltdowns over the months, especially towards the end of treatment.
The fact is life will never be quite the same for me and sometimes this really hits home. I think writing about it or talking about it is important. You need to grieve for the loss of the life you thought you were going to have so that you can move forward and adjust to a different one.
If it is hard for us to know what to do, how to feel, what to say, then we have to remember this is the same for those who love us too. We will all get it wrong sometimes but you just keep trying until it feels better. As Helen says, life is fluid, and we just need to find a new way to go with the flow. Keep trying. Deanne xxx