Hi Anita,I found this booklet from the Cancer Council to be really useful when I had to talk to my kids about my bc diagnosis - they were 8 and 13 at the time - www.cancercouncil.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/2013-CAN737-TalkingToKids-NSW-lo.pdf
The booklet is easy to read and gives some hints about how to tell kids at different developmental stages about your treatment. It also talks about how they might react, and things to look out for.
When my husband and I talked to our children, my son who was 8yrs wanted to know why I had got cancer when I didn't smoke, and also wanted to know if I'd be bald. We told him it was likely I would be bald for a while as I had to have some drugs that made your hair fall out but it also killed off the cancer so that I'd be well again soon. Being a very literal child (with Asperger's) he took this on board and then said; "Well Mum, what would you prefer; to be bald and alive or hairy and dead!" This made us all crack up and helped ease the tension! :-)
It was also good that we had spoken to both kid's schools as they kept a close eye on both kids and were especially great when my teenage daughter was feeling anxious and worried at various times throughout my treatment. Overall though both coped pretty well and I think it helped that we were honest, although we didn't necessarily go into a lot of detail.
Best of luck talking to your daughter, it sounds as though you've already made a few good steps. Jane xx
