Am I just a sook?
It is a year since my first and second Breast cancer excisions and lymph node biopsy. The first was on 3 March 2015 and the 2nd a week later on 10 March 2015. Apparently there was a second cancer near the skin which was missed by all. Not blaming my surgeon who is esteemed by all in the know and friends of friends who have experienced her care. However I was quite shattered by the discovery of the second cancer and the need for another surgery so soon. However the prognosis was good after this and I escaped chemotherapy but had 16 radio therapy treatments. Other than a painful and frustrating frozen shoulder for 12 months which has now sorted itself and the usual tiredness and frustration with not having my usual energy everything has been going ok. Oh, I did have to have a Gall bladder 6 weeks after the breast surgeries with that surgeon and the radio oncologist discussing how to fit it in around radio treatments! So in all, not the worst of things to happen.
My problem is how I feel about the lack of sympathy and emotional from my family. My husband has always been helpful around the house and is regarded well by all. However 3 days after my second Breast surgery he asked ' shouldn't you be over it by now?' Maybe I was being a bit emotional but that shattered me. That someone so close to me and who professes to love me could be so callous. However I tried to put that behind me (never forgiven though as you see). My 2 married daughters were soliticious in the first week or so but soon decided I was not seriously ill - which I wasn't but I can't help wanting more emotional support and understanding of my experience. I suppose the 2nd crunch ( after my husband's comment) came this week when visiting a daughter overseas, my 10 year old granddaughter told me that I didn't have cancer because 'the doctor took it out so you are alright now'. I assured her I was alright but felt hurt that this had been dealt with in so perfunctory a manner. Now my youngest granddaughter has developed chicken pox and while there has been much discussion about whether her other grandparents should visit (one has Rheumatoid arthritis so naturally concerns are raised) when I wondered aloud whether I need to be careful about contact, my daughter just said blithely'too late now'.
Sorry about this long essay but I guess I am feeling unloved and certainly lacking in any family sympathy. Perhaps just a sook!
Thanks for ' listening'