Yep... I became a statistic!

miss lizzie
miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
edited October 2016 in Newly diagnosed

Hi,

I have just had a wirlwind 3 week tour of being diagnosed with BC.  Sorry, I still can't say the word. 

I had my lump out last week and pathology back today - it's happened amazingly fast (private health fund). Only 3 lymphs out - no cancer in lymph nodes stage 1 grade 3 so they want to go back into clear the margins on Monday - small op.on scar already healing.  then have recommended 4 mths chemo then radiation. 

Very scared, trying to wrap my head around everything. Doctors says I will be ok, but seeing how scared my husbnd is and how he is handling it hurts.

Any suggestions to get me through chemo?

I was also thinking cold caps as a I have long hair which is devasting.

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Comments

  • Hazel M
    Hazel M Member Posts: 708
    edited March 2015

    It's so hard to watch our loved ones hurting. As Marg put it, chemo is a tough gig but it is doable. There are lots of preventative tips to ease some of side effects, I recommend being proactive instead of reactive, it really does help. I lost my hair which at the time was difficult, but now 7 months after chemo, looking back, that was the least of my worries. I also got a wig from the library and I became very adept with scarves. Some of the ladies on her have made mention of the cold caps, I'm sure they can advise you, all the best and keep in touch, 

    Hazel xx

  • miss lizzie
    miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2015

    thankyou marg and hazel.  not sure what the wig library is.  this is all new to me    lizzie x

  • margiemoo
    margiemoo Member Posts: 263
    edited March 2015

    our hospital has a "library" of wigs that they lend out to you (borrow period is as long as you need) - mine was brand new and cost me nothing. I just have to return it once I am finished. I don't wear it that often, scarves/turbans more comfortable - but its great to have for special occassions. 

    not sure about the cool caps - maybe some others can answer this. 

    good luck

    Marg xx

  • miss lizzie
    miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2015

    hi shat.  not sure where you are situated, but im in penrith nsw so finding a place that does cool caps will be a challenge.  i dont know my chemo reime yet (monday) but it is suggested 4 mths so not sure how many rounds that is.  my hair is very long  thick curly down to my bra strap.  thought of cutting it to shoulders then giving cool caps a go.  have to find smoewhere that does this.  but your experience isencouraging

    lizzie x

  • Deanne
    Deanne Member Posts: 2,163
    edited March 2015
    I know what you mean about watching those close to you struggle with all this. I think in many ways it is tougher for them because they feel so helpless. My husband and I spent a lot of time talking and I think being honest with each other helped. We both wanted to shield each other but it worked better for us when we were completely open about things.

    You do get through this (I had chemo and radio too) but you need support. My family, friends and this network got me through things.

    I had very thick shoulder length hair. I had it cut short before chemo started and my husband and daughters shaved it on day 14 after my first chemo when it started falling out by the handful. It was sad but for me it was minor in the scheme of things and I have since discovered that short hair is very liberating (I am not spending lots of time blow drying it!). I did use cold mits to prevent damage to nerves and fingernails. These were uncomfortable but definitely seemed to work. My chemo was in winter and I just could not have dealt with having cold caps on.

    Good luck with everything. Deanne xxx
  • Deanne
    Deanne Member Posts: 2,163
    edited March 2015
    I know what you mean about watching those close to you struggle with all this. I think in many ways it is tougher for them because they feel so helpless. My husband and I spent a lot of time talking and I think being honest with each other helped. We both wanted to shield each other but it worked better for us when we were completely open about things.

    You do get through this (I had chemo and radio too) but you need support. My family, friends and this network got me through things.

    I had very thick shoulder length hair. I had it cut short before chemo started and my husband and daughters shaved it on day 14 after my first chemo when it started falling out by the handful. It was sad but for me it was minor in the scheme of things and I have since discovered that short hair is very liberating (I am not spending lots of time blow drying it!). I did use cold mits to prevent damage to nerves and fingernails. These were uncomfortable but definitely seemed to work. My chemo was in winter and I just could not have dealt with having cold caps on.

    Good luck with everything. Deanne xxx
  • miss lizzie
    miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2015

    thanks deanne,  had small win today they were going to do more surgery to check the margins.  reviewed all the results and said its out.  so no more surgery and monday visit the oncologist to discuss treatment.  scared but have to go with it.  they say 4mths chemo not sure how many rounds that is.  but i have deathly fear of needles so going to be hard going for me.  i cant even get my teeth cleaned with out gas!  how long did it take for your hair to grow back.  thats the most distressing thing im facing i know.   Lizzie x

  • Deanne
    Deanne Member Posts: 2,163
    edited March 2015
    I am glad that you had some good news and no more surgery for you. It is really scarey but I think you can surprise yourself with what you are capable of when you have no choice. The chemo nurses were so good at getting the cannula in and so gentle and understanding. If you tell them your fears sometimes they have suggestions about ways to make it easier.

    My hair took a while to grow back and I would have been very worried except that I knew one of the other ladies on here took a while too. It so helps to keep in contact with people who have been through this too. My profile photo shows my hair growth 6 months after my last chemo. It was slow compared to many others but at least there was no more grey than before! I actually found it harder to cope with losing my eyebrows and eyelashes than the hair but they did come back quite quickly and I only lost them around my 5th chemo (out of 6) so I was lucky really.

    It is so hard to know how you will cope but one way or another we all do. The most amazing thing for me was how lovely everyone was about things. Even people I hardly knew were very caring and helpful. For every bad bit there were lots of good bits too. Take care. Deanne xxx
  • Kirsty Hobart
    Kirsty Hobart Member Posts: 2
    edited March 2015

    Hi Lizzie,

    I have joined BCNA tonight as I was only diagnosed with breast cancer last week.

    I have no words of wisdom for you as I'm behind, just a fairy step behind, you on the path.

    If you feel my shadow it's a friendly one.

    I hope we can help each other through this business.

    I'm having a mastectomy next week and trying to be positive, practical and sensible.

    Take care and hope to talk soon

    Kirsty

    xxxxx

     

  • Kirsty Hobart
    Kirsty Hobart Member Posts: 2
    edited March 2015

    Hi Lizzie,

    I have joined BCNA tonight as I was only diagnosed with breast cancer last week.

    I have no words of wisdom for you as I'm behind, just a fairy step behind, you on the path.

    If you feel my shadow it's a friendly one.

    I hope we can help each other through this business.

    I'm having a mastectomy next week and trying to be positive, practical and sensible.

    Take care and hope to talk soon

    Kirsty

    xxxxx

     

  • miss lizzie
    miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2015

    kirsty,    there are so many brave women on this site and others that  chose anominity to deal with this.  for me i am hoping to get practical advice and tips from those who have walked this path before.

    so far, im hanging in there.  lucky my husband is an angel.  i meet my oncoloogist on monday at 2 to discuss treatment which is scary and i think xmas will be a bust.lol  but one shitty xmas in a lifetime of them is a miniscule price to pay.  i know i have some chemo and radiation to do, and am finding looking at scarves etc very confronting, but i have to try and be practical, so today i will be surfing the net.lol.  you like me, have the strength and hopefully the support. 

    i just didnt think i was that strong, but who knew.  take care and wishes for next weeks surgery. will b thinking of you

  • margiemoo
    margiemoo Member Posts: 263
    edited March 2015

    try headcovers.com - they have heaps of lovely ones. 

    yeah I also have thought that some months out of 2014 is not that much to pay for the benefit of putting BC behind me (although it never fully goes away). Its a tough gig but you can do it. Try and remain positive and strong, and stay on here. 

    Marg xx

     

  • margiemoo
    margiemoo Member Posts: 263
    edited March 2015

    try headcovers.com - they have heaps of lovely ones. 

    yeah I also have thought that some months out of 2014 is not that much to pay for the benefit of putting BC behind me (although it never fully goes away). Its a tough gig but you can do it. Try and remain positive and strong, and stay on here. 

    Marg xx

     

  • miss lizzie
    miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2015

    thanks margiemoo. will do.  no when i finished this im going to expunge the whole episode.  put it in a box and leave it there.lol  its the only way that i can move forward i think. xxx

  • miss lizzie
    miss lizzie Member Posts: 25
    edited March 2015

    hi 5girls,  same diagnosis. except margin wasnt fully clear. still have 4mm from margin. but will query it on monday in my first meeting with oncologist.  thankyou.   have ductual carcinoma with insitu carcenoma on outside.  not sure what this means, but def will ask.

     

    lizzie x