Has anyone decided on a total life change ?
BlackWidow
Lake GardensMember Posts: 259 ✭
in Day to day
I realise that to some this post may be quite stupid but ...... I will persevere ..... Since my BC diagnosis 4 years ago I have been unsettled. The whole COVID thing has made things worse. As my husband passed away just prior to my diagnosis and we have no family at all I feel really at a loss in the world. I decided a total break from this cold Victorian town would be great but when I see a property and travel interstate for a viewing, with much difficulty, I am sorely disappointed. I find the whole selling and buying scene to be so full of smoke and mirrors. Has anyone else made the big change and how did you do it ? I just want to get somewhere warmer than where I am and to make a new start. Help ! Thank you.
2
Comments
I think,in my mind,I was trying to streamline life for my husband incase I died.I was being practical,not morbid
That was 11yrs ago and it worked out for the best.We retired,then travelled and enjoyed life. If you feel unsettled then it’s time to do some research. It would be hard to move away from good friends though- lots to consider.
I don't know if your finances allow but could you rent somewhere for 6 months? Maybe get a feel for a new town before taking a huge leap?
You could also then consider putting your current possessions into storage and renting out your house while you're away to get some income?
It might be complicated but it leaves a door open if you want to return.
If you love the new place then you can take steps to make the move permanent.
Another option might be to do house-sitting. I don't know how it works but I assume there are websites and organisations you could register with? Maybe something to explore?
My mum ( still going strong at 88) also calls herself the Black Widow as she has survived the death of two husbands.
Anyway , I think a breast cancer diagnosis leads to many of us re assessing our lives as after all we have stared mortality in the face.
I didn’t go so far as moving house , but I did decide to scale back on my work and learn to say “no” more often and be a little but selfish.
Only thing I would say about moving yo a new place is that if you sell and buy that costs a lot in terms of stamp duty so renting for say 6 months might be safer.
And don’t be worried about posting anything on here , no question is out of bounds and it’s a very supportive community.
Take care🌺
If you can afford it why not take a holiday maybe in a caravan park to see if the area has appeal, then regardless if you find something youve had a change of scene and sense of accomplishment.
im feeling some unsettledness. Not the kind that would make me move but more I want to do stuff and not waste time. I might join a club or something. Im working less than full time, exercise regularly. I feel bored at times mentally and not able to live as i should. Cant be bothered with housework. I just signed on to be part of a wellbeing (mental health) and cancer research thing, starts this week in evening. I think mentally im not relying on work for my identity. I spend a lot of time driving kids around. I get frustrated if not doing things. I think i want to feel more in control and live how i want but its not fully defined.
the big move is hard. Like you i lost my husband to cancer the year before i was diagnosed. Sold the huge house and downsized now i am in the process of doing it all again. This time i am building an addition onto my daughters house. I found i couldn’t keep up with the maintenance even though its a smaller place.