Overwhelmed

I have just been diagnosed a few weeks ago and will undergo a mastectomy and breast reconstruction later this week.
At times it feels so surreal and then there is a sudden sense of feeling so overwhelmed and it is so all consuming.
Then find myself trying to keep "busy" and maybe that is my way of avoiding confronting the diagnosis, have spoken with the psychologist which helped immensely.
By nature I am a "planner", I plan everything however this feels so out of my control.
Thank you for reading/listening.
At times it feels so surreal and then there is a sudden sense of feeling so overwhelmed and it is so all consuming.
Then find myself trying to keep "busy" and maybe that is my way of avoiding confronting the diagnosis, have spoken with the psychologist which helped immensely.
By nature I am a "planner", I plan everything however this feels so out of my control.
Thank you for reading/listening.
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Your feelings of all consuming worry are normal. Being a planner will be useful. I always requested copies of all of my test results. My mind would race until I fully understood my situation. Only then could I feel somewhat in control. I don't know how some patients are happy to go with the flow and just trust in the 'experts'. Lucky I did insist on keeping track as, in my experience of the public health system, I have had to remind the oncologist of my case every time I see her! (obviously not time to read the file or prepare for appointment). Keep planning!
It will take time, but you will feel more normal again.
Sorry to hear of your diagnosis.
All of us can empathise. The first few weeks are stressful and scary. After my first week i felt sick of people poking and prodding and i wanted action but i was terrified too. The wait for surgery seemed endless and this hieghtened the sense of panic.
Not sure if this helps but i felt enormous relief after surgery because we were finally getting on with something concrete. Hopefully you will too. Things will start to get planned out and you will get on with the business of getting well and caring for yourself.
I think most people start to come to terms to a degree as you go along.
The best thing is to try to take one step at a time, worry about what is happening at each stage. Look after yourself, be kind to yourself.
M
for your upcoming surgery
from jennyss in Western NSW
Welcome to the club that no-one wants to join .... ask away any question that you want here & you'll get an honest answer.
Yep, It's a real train wreck to start off with - plus the shock of diagnosis as well .... we've all been there, so 'we get it' - sometimes, family & friends 'don't'!
That is terrific that you've spoken with the psychologist already, to give you coping mechanisms, as your emotions & feelings may well sway over the next couple of months - and years.
Try & get back into doing the things you love (as you are able to do so) or even try something 'new' - to give you the urge to get out & about ..... Yep - keeping busy is the trick, I find. Don't be afraid to ask for help if/when you need it.
Try not to use Dr Google too much (difficult tho it is) as there is just so much conflicting information out there (and much of it is REALLY OLD & OUT OF DATE), and every BC case is totally 'unique' and it will only scare the pants off you!
We have lots of different areas here that you can check out too - some for a laugh, some for showing off your art & crafts ...As you haven't had your surgery yet, we have some posts here on what to take with you to hospital, to make it 'easier' on you.
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/16442/prep-for-surgery/p1
And for your appointments & annual checkups, here are some ‘tick sheets’ to help you put your questions together for your medical team. (Make sure you click on the documents at the BOTTOM of the post, as the others are only sample pages.)
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/21973/questions-to-ask-post-surgery-of-yourself-to-your-specialists-tick-sheets-self-assessment/p1
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/19116/friday-funnies#latest
or some wise words
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/20854/wise-words#latest
..... you can show us how good you are at Art & Craft,
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/14979/creative-corner#latest
or show us your pets
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/15588/what-pets-do-you-have#latest
& garden!
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/comment/186078#Comment_186078
Or show us your quickest, easiest favourite meal ..
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/18971/what-are-your-easiest-tastiest-meals-quick-to-prepare-when-you-cant-think-of-anything#latest
So take care, all the best for your surgery (make sure you have a small pillow/cushion to hug on your drive home from the hospital! Any jarring by hitting bumps can HURT! Hugging the cushion can minimise this! xx
I am a planner too. I felt better once my surgery was done and the whole treatment plan was developed and I knew all the treatment I had to go through. I had surgery, chemo, radium, more surgery and now tamoxifen. I am now one yr and 2 months post my diagnosis. It was alot to go through but I am doing well and you will too.
One step at a time. Stay as much as possible in the present moment. If you are into mindfulness it is good and so too is a bit of exercise, even gentle walks. Just do what you enjoy and please make yourself the priority.
If you are like many others here we all looked after everyone else first and put ourselves second. Make all this treatment and getting well your number one thing. It was a change for me but it is better not just for me but everyone else too.
Good luck, stay in touch as you go through this as we are all here to help. The people here are all just so amazing. Hugs 🌺
Thank you so much, there are few ideas here that had not crossed my mind.
Will certainly trawl through those links suggested, thankyou @arpie
The only websites I look at are the ones suggested by my breast surgeon.
Am very positive that I will kick this to the curb.
Thank you again
Take care & all the best for your surgery if you haven't had it yet xx
If there is anything we can help you with, just ask xx