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New city, New diagnosis, Looking for support

SunnyB
SunnyB Member Posts: 4
edited September 2019 in Metastatic breast cancer
Hi everyone, this is my first post.  I was diagnosed with MBC (to bone) about 4 weeks ago.  I was initially diagnosed at 36 with IDC.  It was a difficult time as my daughter was only 5yrs and my son was only 5 months.  But after a very difficult period during and following treatment (the whole shebang), it took around 5 years for our little family to mend itself and move on from the trauma. 

So my partner found work in a new city (Canberra) and we moved, looking forward to a fresh start.   After my initial diagnosis I lost many friends who found it too hard to be around me as I was going through treatment, and this has lead me to be somewhat of a loner.  But in a new city I felt like it was a new start, new people who didn't know what my health history was...  I was getting out and meeting people, doing physical activities, and enjoying life until I began to get aches.  Being my first proper winter in 10 years, I put the pains down to the cold weather, but it just didn't get any better.  My 12 month review came up in August and that's when my scans came back with mets to my C2, shoulders, pelvis, ribs and femur.  Needless to say I'm feeling a little overwhelmed and helpless as I don't have any support here.  

I have spoken with the social worker and have lined up time with the psychologist, but there isn't really anything that is on offer for someone with a now, 11 year old and a 6 year old. I don't need a cleaner, or a nanny service so I can rest.  I'm working from home as well which keeps me somewhat isolated, and my employer is very understanding.  I'm also quite gun shy about trying to make new friends because having to divulge my health history at some stage may drive them away.  

So I guess, I would like to know if there are any Mets groups in Canberra for younger women with children.  I can't seem to find anything in the Canberra region.   I'm really quite desperate as I feel so alone right now.  

Thank you :)

Comments

  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,539
    Hi @SunnyB

    As noted above there are some useful links from @arpie
    Here's another from the BCNA website that you can work your way through to find something nearby where you are living

    https://www.bcna.org.au/services-and-support-groups/services/31400

    The groups within the forum that were mentioned above that you may find beneficial

    https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/group/10-young-women

    https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/group/2-living-with-metastatic-breast-cancer

    Take care 


  • SunnyB
    SunnyB Member Posts: 4
    @arpie @iserbrown :)  Thank you so much. I'll check out the links tonight. 
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Welcome @SunnyB I hope that you are able to make contact with people who will get it.  This forum is great but it's good to have some real live friends that understand.
  • Canberramum
    Canberramum Member Posts: 4

    SunnyB said:

    Hi everyone, this is my first post.  I was diagnosed with MBC (to bone) about 4 weeks ago.  I was initially diagnosed at 36 with IDC.  It was a difficult time as my daughter was only 5yrs and my son was only 5 months.  But after a very difficult period during and following treatment (the whole shebang), it took around 5 years for our little family to mend itself and move on from the trauma. 

    So my partner found work in a new city (Canberra) and we moved, looking forward to a fresh start.   After my initial diagnosis I lost many friends who found it too hard to be around me as I was going through treatment, and this has lead me to be somewhat of a loner.  But in a new city I felt like it was a new start, new people who didn't know what my health history was...  I was getting out and meeting people, doing physical activities, and enjoying life until I began to get aches.  Being my first proper winter in 10 years, I put the pains down to the cold weather, but it just didn't get any better.  My 12 month review came up in August and that's when my scans came back with mets to my C2, shoulders, pelvis, ribs and femur.  Needless to say I'm feeling a little overwhelmed and helpless as I don't have any support here.  

    I have spoken with the social worker and have lined up time with the psychologist, but there isn't really anything that is on offer for someone with a now, 11 year old and a 6 year old. I don't need a cleaner, or a nanny service so I can rest.  I'm working from home as well which keeps me somewhat isolated, and my employer is very understanding.  I'm also quite gun shy about trying to make new friends because having to divulge my health history at some stage may drive them away.  

    So I guess, I would like to know if there are any Mets groups in Canberra for younger women with children.  I can't seem to find anything in the Canberra region.   I'm really quite desperate as I feel so alone right now.  

    Thank you :)

    Hi SunnyB did you find supports in Canberra? I’m from Canberra too and newly diagnosed and would like to have local group. I’ve also got young kids 9 and 6 years old.
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,519
    So sorry to hear of your diagnosis, @Canberramum It is such an emotional whirlwind in the early days - but it does get 'easier' once you've had your surgery & get your game plan.

    I hope you can connect with @SunnyB and be your own support group (you can message her privately by clicking on her name & then on the 'envelope' that is to the right of her name when her profile pops up) - with the kids & all, finding new buddies too!!     

    Having said that - here are the dates that Bossom Buddies are getting together in different suburbs from January on ..... hopefully you'll both be able to trot along to one/some of them & meet up with like minded folk.  xx

    All the best for 2020 xx