All clear

Doin'it
Doin'it Member Posts: 377
edited February 2019 in General discussion
Been for results & given the all clear. Thank goodness for that, but how come I don’t feel the elation that family & friends are feeling?? I feel a sense of relief but not excitement & not wanting to go out & celebrate.  Is it the fear of it reoccurring? Maybe in a few days I will feel it....Maybe I’ve just had enough now after op, chemo & radiation. Maybe it’s time to chill out & forget it for a while 
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Comments

  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,519
    WOOHOO!!  Good news, tho, @Doodoo - everyone reacts differently ..... you are probably just 'over it all' just now.  

    Chill out, treat yourself to a nice meal out & a movie ..... and just keep doing what you love doing

    All the best xxx

  • Doin'it
    Doin'it Member Posts: 377
    Love ya @arpie! You always make me feel better 😊
    i actually just had a little melt down after reading that & I feel lighter. you’re right, I’m over it all xx
  • SoldierCrab
    SoldierCrab Member Posts: 3,445
    hi Doodoo it is quite common to feel like you do .... I felt as flat as a tack when I got told all clear.... 
    If you need support seek some professional counselling I did 

    Congratulations you are now officially a Warrior .... Survivorship is not easy at times but we grow stronger each day.... 

    Soldiercrab

  • Annie C
    Annie C Member Posts: 849
    @Doodoo
    At the end of my treatment I found myself questioning "is that all?"

    Letting go and surviving was the hardest until I realised that "yes, that is all. You are fortunate".

    I have had many a private conversation with @arpie,  and through our many "chats" ( via PM) she has bolstered and provided much support to me. I suspect that she will be much embrassed by this.

    Eighteen months later I now find myself facing another health challenge, but I now tell myself that I faced breast cancer, stared it down and I will do the same with this new challenge.

    During treatment we are focussed on getting through it. Survivorship is just as hard. There were times when I questioned "why me, why did my life have to change so much"? I am NOT a "why not me" person. 

    The one thing I have learnt through all this is that tomorrow always comes and it is not as bad as I thought it would be.

    I cannot give you any platitudes, I can only say there will come a time when the memory of all that has happened will not hurt so much.

    Big hugs and warm Kimberley wishes to you.

    Annie




  • Doin'it
    Doin'it Member Posts: 377
    @arpie @SoldierCrab @Annie C @kitkatb I’m overwhelmed by your support & I thank you deeply. I think I’m facing every emotion possible today. I think I thought I would be overly excited & elated & when I didn’t feel that, I wasn’t sure what was going on. The loads lifting with the help of you lovely ladies!! 
    @Annie C I send a big hug to you & hope all goes well with your recent health challenge ❤️
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    Well done @Doodoo. I was flat when I finished too and posted something incredibly similar here. I never jumped for joy but a few months later I had a profound sense of satisfaction that treatment was done, dusted and behind me. Big hug, K xox
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,519
    I am glad you are feeling better ....... I have heaps of melt downs - some mini, some not so mini!   LOL

    It's almost a 'void' isn't it @Doodoo  ..... ever since detection, diagnosis, biopsy, surgery chemo/rads, tabs .... we are on a relentless treadmill & and every waking moment is taken up with something BC or planning something else BC.  Then .... it stops!  The umbilical chord is cut!  And it has been such a huge part of our lives for the last 1-2 years.   It will take a little time to settle down, methinks. xx

    I see my surgeon in late Feb for my 1st year review ...... I reckon I'll be feeling like you afterwards xxx

    All the best, Warrior xxxxx

    Thank you @Annie C  ..... you have helped me as much as I may have helped you xxxxx  Take care, lovely lady xx
     

  • Annie C
    Annie C Member Posts: 849
    @Doodoo
    Thankyou, I am now wrapped in a great big hug.

    It is just my lungs. They are not full of as much air as they should be, although there are some in town who would say that I am full of it as I have been known for putting in my 2 bobs worth. Not lately, not enough air to talk!!!!

    However I am on the "urgent" respiratory clinic list at a major hospital in Perth (although I received the sms message 3 weeks ago, however no appointment as yet). Another "holiday" in Perth coming up!

    Life sure is interesting and exciting!

    I value your good wishes.


  • Giovanna_BCNA
    Giovanna_BCNA Member Posts: 1,839
    Hi @Annie C take care of you and lets hope you get into the respiratory clinic asap!
  • Doin'it
    Doin'it Member Posts: 377
    Take care @Annie C. Everything crossed you get to that clinic asap. Please keep us up to date when you’re able xx
  • tigerbeth
    tigerbeth Member Posts: 539
    @doodoo I think a lot of us feel the same ! Happy for you ! As time goes by I expect it will get better.
    I think  we feel cautiously optimistic about stuff but really expect the worse more often than not ! 
    I remember after my op & the results were clear & they didn't have to go back in I was in total shock .
    And lets face it we know more than family & friends about this crap .
     My 12 months is in April ,fingerscrossed .
    @Annie C  hope you are able to breathe freely asap ! All my love  & hugs to you xx
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Great news @Doodoo But it's not really a celebration I think - just a relief.
  • Annie C
    Annie C Member Posts: 849
    Thankyou everyone. Your concern is heartwarming. I am sure that it will all be sorted and I will eventually have an "urgent" appointment date, not holding my breath - not wise as there is not much breath in me!

    I am pleased that after all my temper trantrums, meltdowns, insistance, standing my ground and not giving up that finally my ragged breathing is being taken seriously. Just wish that the medicos had listened eighteen months ago.

    My heartfelt thanks to all of you.

    Warm (today very warm) Kimberley wishes to you.



  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,539
    @Annie C  Here's hoping that trip to Perth will sort out soon and give you a better understanding and treatment plan!  Goodness what a trek it is when something needs looking at!  We are all so fortunate in comparison!
    Take care and know that good vibes are coming from here