Newly Diagnosed
Flossy
Member Posts: 12 ✭
Hello lovely ladies, I was diagnosed 3 weeks ago following after a routine mammogram. At the call back session at BreastScreen they told me I had breast cancer and had to wait the agonising week to find out results of a FNA of axillia. A week later diagnosis was confirmed Moderately differentiated invasive ducal carcinoma and positive lymph node involement. Was difficult to except with no lump to feel, no symptoms to see and a month till I turn 50... Have seen a surgeon, had all CT, MRI & bone scan tests. Finally some positive news my cancer is ER & PR positive, Her 2 status neg. My surgeon agreed to let me go to Fiji next week with my family to celebrate my milestone birthday and have been booked for wide excision lumpectomy and axillary dissection on 4/9/18. She also started me on tamoxifen. The waiting for results has been the hardest. I am a midwife and registered nurse, I kept thinking about all the beautiful women I looked after 30 years ago who were so butchered and so incredibly ill from chemo....demons in my head.Reading your posts in so very comforting to someone who is about to start the long journey...
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Hi Flossy. So sorry you find yourself here in the club that no one wants to join. But as places to hang out go, this is a very warm and supportive one. Feel free to vent, rage, cry, worry and ask as many questions as you like. We'll hold your hand every step of the way.
Right now you're in the thick of the worst of it, the beginning. The waiting for results is the absolute pits. It all gets better once your treatment is underway. Bizzarely you get used it, it becomes routine. In the meantime, really try your hardest to live each day one at a time. Try not to cross any bridges until you come to them.
I was similarly petrified of chemo because of the memories I had of my mother's BC treatment in 1986. Chemo and mastectomies have come a long way since then. We all react so differently to the drugs and no one gets all the side effects. It's a grotty slog but it's doable, and you have to remember why you're doing it and keep your eyes on the prize.
I get the unreality. I was diagnosed at 51 from a routine mammogram and my tumour was so deep no one could feel it. It still feels surreal, and that I'll wake up and find it's all been a horrible dream.
However, I'm out the other side and you'll get there too. In the meantime, try to relax on the white tropical sands of Fiji and have a wonderful birthday celebration. Many happy returns! K xox3 -
Welcome and yes knowledge can help but we can over think.
Have you got a My Journey kit on order yet and do you have a breast care nurse?1 -
Welcome @Flossy. I was diagnosed in December last year at 54 after a routine screen. I was just ticking the boxes getting my health checks and had no idea there was anything wrong. I was in total shock to get the call back and then to find out it was positive. I had lobular carcinoma with node involvement (also ER & PR +, HER - ) and ended up with a mastectomy and dissection. I then went on to 6 months of chemo - AC-T. I won't lie - it wasn't fun but it was do-able. It does affect different people in different ways. Some go on with the practicalities of life with few side effects, some are get ill at times through it, most fall somewhere in the middle. I'm on to my radiation programme now as well as hormone therapy. I know that I'm giving it all I can to stop it coming back and that's all I can do.
Try to relax and enjoy your birthday trip. Let the waves and sunshine take your worries away for a little while and capture a happy place in your memories to go to when things get you down. (And don't forget to tell @socoda when your birthday is so she can put it on her calendar!)4 -
Hi @Flossy. Yes, I agree with @kmakm. The waiting at the start is the worst. I had a lumpectomy & 9 lymph nodes removed with one node positive, all margins clear. Er+ Pr+ Her-.
I’m having TC Chemo & it is doable. It’s actually not as bad as I thought. Had a few side effects, but that was only in the first week or so.
Make sure you drink 2 to 3 ltrs of water/coconut water or whatever liquid you choose to wash the toxins out every day. I also try & walk/jog most days. I’m still able to eat as usual.
2nd chemo due next Wednesday & I want it to hurry up because then I’m half way through. Although wondering how I’ll go this time.
Radiation & hormonal treatment to follow. Bring on next year!! Time is flying so getting a bit excited about 2019.
Try & enjoy your holiday, sounds amazing!!!
Take care & let us know how you get on xx2 -
Forgot to add aggressive grade 3 cancer0
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Welcome @Flossy,
The demons in the head is possibly the hardest part. One minute it's like Yep. I got this" and the next your scared stiff and howling your eyes out.
Our brains do like to conjure up the worst case scenario for reasons known only to itself and all the waiting around at the start just does your head in.
I had similar to you. No lump in the breast could ever be felt by anyone, thankfully it couldn't escape the MRI. I had the same surgery lumpectomy, aux clearance (5 nodes involved). ER+ PR + Her2 neg. 6 mths chemo and 30 rads. I had felt the lump in my lymph nodes so I had a fairly good idea of what it was going to turn out to be. Still horribly shocking though. It's all so hard to believe when you feel perfectly fine.
At the beginning it feels like it's going to take a lifetime to get through. Time travels fast and you're so busy with appointments and treatment, hey presto, and you're out the other side before you know it.
I did pretty well through chemo, kept my hair with the cold cap and had next to no problems with rads. It does suck but sometimes it's nowhere near as horrid as what you think it is going to be.
Keep chatting to us, everyone here knows how you are feeling.
Enjoy your holiday lovely.
xoxoxoxoxo3 -
Hi Lovelies,
your posts are so wonderful to read ... so what I needed to hear, so much hope and encouragement gained. What a beautiful lot of women you are so strong and brave, gentle and sharing.
Hope the day is kind to all of you xx3 -
Hi primek,
Yes I have been fortunate to have been assigned a breast nurse... we have chatted on email a couple of times. She so kindly ordered the My Journey kit for me, which I have started to read. I believe a bra is on its way too.
Many thanks x1 -
Hi @Flossy, my diagnosis is tracking
alongside yours, having arrived via a different path and with a different
treatment plan. I was found to have a BRCA1 mutation, then 3 weeks ago at my
first mammogram and U/S, IDC and DCIS was detected, ER & PR positive, HER2
equivocal – which can’t be felt. My MRI also showed possible DCIS in both
breasts. After much soul searching, because of the BRCA1 status I’ve decided to
have a bilateral mastectomy and sentinel node biopsy, with immediate expander reconstruction
on 5th September; followed by implants in a few months. I’ve also
just turned 50, and am an RN – sometimes I think the extra knowledge we have
doesn’t always help us.I agree with @kezmusc, one minute you feel like you’ve got this and the
next you’re scared stiff. Even though my decision is made and an operation date
has been set I’m riding an emotional roller-coaster, shifting between “this is
no big deal” to “OMG this isn’t happening”. For the most part I think my head
is down in the sand trying to ignore “that day” which is rapidly approaching.The women on this
forum are amazingly supportive and generous with helpful advice and comments. I
am still a bit of a silent stalker of the posts, as my brain is all over the
place, but the few times I have put my toe in the water, the feedback I have
received has been invaluable.We’ve got this; we
can tread the path together. Have an absolutely fantastic 50th
celebration in Fiji. The glorious sand, sun and shared time with family will
take you to a “happy place” in those times when the journey gets hard. Sharyn
xx4 -
Hi Jameela,
You are a strong beautiful woman.... you have got this. As scary as this is “ the unknown” plus the demons of knowledge and what we have experienced in our careers .... there is no other option to even consider. And when you are out the end other side of this journey you will be stronger and more beautiful because if your battle.
Thank you for my Birthday and holiday wishes ... I will have a cocktail for all the strong, brave beautiful women on this network. Xx1 -
Hi @Flossy - welcome to this forum - it's a place where you can come for support any time of the day or night. There's always someone on line and there's always someone who can relate to what you're going through.
I was diagnosed with bilateral lobular carcinoma in January, aged 52, and had a double mastectomy in April at which point I had a full axillary node clearance on the left side. I've finished AC chemo (4 x 2 weeks apart) and I'm now half way through 12 x weekly Taxol chemo infusions. After that I'll have radiation then hormone therapy as my carcinoma was also ER/PR +ve.
I've heard so many people tell me about the 'butchery' that was performed on women decades ago. We're really so fortunate to have come so far with treatment and surgery - although there's still a long way to go and much more that can improve.
Have an amazing time in Fiji - enjoy every minute, and when you get back and start your treatment, please keep in touch and let us know how you're doing. xx3
