Onc. who failed to inform me fully

[Deleted User]
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edited April 2018 in General discussion
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  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    You can always try to find someone else (GP recommendation?) if you really feel that the situation is untenable.
  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,372
    Tell her she is a huge disappointment and has destroyed your faith in her profession. Tell her, by email, that you will not pay her another cent. Report her to the Clinical Oncology Society. 
    I'd pick up the phone and tell her she is a ....well you can take your pick of any number of expletives that would get me moderated. We must not attack the sacred profession even when they behave in unconscionable ways. Which is why they get away with it.
    Give her a serve and get a referral to someone else who is not part of the same practice. 
  • Romla
    Romla Member Posts: 2,092
    Ask around on here people that are in your area and find a new one.You are the consumer of medical services - wouldn’t you return a faulty good ? And oncologists fees are very much higher than most other things you buy. I also agree with reporting her to the Clinical Oncology Society in the hope she is cautioned and no one else experiences similar. Sorry @Zoffiel whilst an expletive or six might make us feel better it won’t get a hearing nor bring about change. Better to put those kind of things on paper and burn it.
  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,372
    The great thing about public forums is the variety of responses you get to pretty much any question. With luck, you will come up with a hybrid solution that suits your temperament and your circumstances. 

    Main thing is, don't be shy. These people are just like your butcher, baker or candlestick maker--skilled but still dependent on your custom. Without you, there is no them. Don't stay with a service provider who doesn't provide the service you have paid for. Particularly if they have been careless enough to put you at a disadvantage.

    I'd be extremely angry and would be communicating that in a variety of ways. A good slap in the wallet or the reputation hurts them, a good vent helps me. Its a wide wild intersting world and we all find our own way through it. Mxx

  • cecily
    cecily Member Posts: 20
    Hi Aggie. I know how you feel. Exactly the same thing happened to me. My surgeon kept my pathology report from me until I insisted on seeing it 3 months post op and discovered that my margins were involved on the mastectomy specimen. I was furious and felt betrayed and also wondered whether I would be able to continue to see him. When I approached him about it I could tell that he GENUINELY thought that it was a small issue in the greater scheme of things and I subsequently felt that I had made quite a big deal of quite a small issue. I’m still angry 6 months later but have had lots of time to think about things and realise that he didn’t do it deliberately to hurt me, he had provided excellent care up until that point, doctors are human too and can also get tired/bored/ stressed and that a little forgiveness would probably be in my best interest in the long term. I don’t think my relationship with my surgeon will ever be quite the same again but as I see it, I have more to lose if I stop seeing him than he does. Good luck with your decision. It’s not easy. 
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    Aggie, if it was me I'd be going straight back to my GP or breast surgeon and asking for a referral to a different oncologist (and yes, as @Zoffiel says, one at a different practice). I am a little uncertain about my onc and am toying with the idea of doing the same.

    We're all different with how much stomach we have for 'the fight'. It's often dependent on what else is happening in our lives at the time. You can elaborate on why you you want a change, or you could just say it's an important ongoing relationship and you're not comfortable with her. Write the letter of complaint, or not. The most important thing at this juncture is that you get the best care for you, and to do that you need to have confidence in your medical team. Get settled with a new onc and maybe report the old one then.

    Good luck, and let us know what you decide.
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,540
    That's a shame however it sounds like you have lost trust and that is an important aspect in our travels through the BC trauma.  Back to GP for referral to somewhere else that is not connected with your present Onc.
    This is about you not the Onc  
  • Kiwi Angel
    Kiwi Angel Member Posts: 1,952
    @Aggie - I had a horrible experience with my surgeon who, before I got all CT scan and pathology results, told me I had stage 4 breast cancer and I did not it turns out!!  Put myself and my hubby through hell for about 48 hours. Understandably I have now got a referral for ongoing treatment for a new surgeon and I’m still thinking about putting in a complaint about him. Don’t put up with any crap!!
  • [Deleted User]
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  • kezmusc
    kezmusc Member Posts: 1,544
    Hey @Aggie,

    That's just not good enough is it?  Definitely I would change onc's and I did.  I was decidedly unhappy with the first oncologist that I saw right at the beginning.  I did not like her attitude or total lack of empathy.  So I go a new one. 

    As far as the reports go.  You are entitled to ask for a copy of anything and everything.  I have a complete set of every pathology result, scan results and bloods.  If you don't ask, they wont offer.  It will just stay in your manilla folder.

    The only one I had an issue with is my 12 month MRI. As it had been ordered by the hospital the results went straight to them.  My next review wasn't for 3 months.  I wasn't going to wait that long for them so I rang my breast care nurse, she checked the results with my team and emailed me a copy within 10 minutes with the "all good".
    @Kiwi Angel what happened to you is just disgusting.  That should not happen to anyone, ever.  
    XOXOXO
  • Romla
    Romla Member Posts: 2,092
    It’s things like this I wish young medical students as well as experienced doctors were made aware of. Being reminded they are dealing with vulnerable human beings .
  • [Deleted User]
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  • Kiwi Angel
    Kiwi Angel Member Posts: 1,952
    @Aggie @kezmusc - disgusting isn’t it!!  I keep a record of all my results too in my little folder that I carry to every appointment. 
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    edited April 2018
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  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    @Joannie A two month wait at Stage 3 shocks me. Were you told that was normal?