Struggling to cope

KlpKlp Member Posts: 1
edited November 11 in Newly diagnosed
Hi everyone,

im one week diagnosed with 5cm triple negative stage 2 grade 3 breast cancer. I’m completely freaking out but I’m really struggling to see past anything but dark thoughts.CT scan showed up clear and having bone scan and genetics test this week.

 I recently had a baby and have a six year old and all I can think about is how much I don’t want to leave them behind. I have such horrible thoughts when I close my eyes at night- I think about death I’ve even seen myself in palliative care and saying my last goodbyes. I can’t even think of one positive thought. 

My treatment plan is chemo first once a fortnight for eight weeks then once a week for 12 weeks then double mastectomy and potentially radiation. I’m so overwhelmed. Can I beat this? 

I’m mentally struggling to cope and see the possibility of life. 

Thanks
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Comments

  • Riki_BCNARiki_BCNA Administrator, Staff, Member, Moderator Posts: 271
    Hello @Klp sending you a private message.
  • SisterSister Adelaide Hills, SAMember Posts: 4,428
    The others have pretty much said it.  You're in a frightening and dark space at the moment but you will get through it.  Allow yourself to breathe and take things as they come.  You can scream and you can cry - it's okay.  Get counselling if you need to and check out CanTeen for advice and info with your 6 yo.  
  • jennyssjennyss Western NSWMember Posts: 628
    Dear @Klp,

    and best wishes from jennyss in Western NSW
  • mum2jjmum2jj Member Posts: 3,962
    @kip. I am 10 years on from 1st triple neg diagnosis and 8 1/2 from a pesky little recurrance. I also had a positive lymph node. It’s scary, but there are many positive outcomes. 
    Hang in there and try and take one day at a time. 
    Hugs. 
    Paula xxxx
  • JJ70JJ70 FremantleMember Posts: 980
    @Klp. There is no doubt that this diagnosis throws you into spins of uncertainty and fear. Trepidation is rife and thoughts that you might be leaving this world before you're ready are rife. A mum in my school community, just turned 40 and had a mammogram (because of my story and the Can at 40. Do at 45 campaign) which revealed a triple positive BC. She, like you is going through the scans now, completely frightened of the extent of what may be found. It is a very difficult time. I have no words to console you, except, just take it slow. Breast cancer is a shit sandwich - take one bite at a time. Do anything that brings you joy and comfort at this stage of proceedings. Pull in your support team with your feelings - tell them where you're at. Distraction is good - movie, lunch with a friend, exercise - hard to do these things with new bub I am sure. Congratulations btw on your second child. BIG cuddles!
  • Barks34Barks34 Member Posts: 23
    You can be too. Don’t give up. Wishing you the very best. Look after yourself and be kind to you xx
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