Pros and cons

MaryB83
MaryB83 Member Posts: 45
Looking for pros and cons of staying flat vs reconstruction please

Comments

  • Afraser
    Afraser Member Posts: 4,444
    Very hard decision because I think it's often based on a lot of intangibles. I had a single mastectomy and stayed mono boobed. I can cite the 12 month seroma and the ensuing infections and my disinclination to risk all that again with more surgery but the truth is that I never fancied reconstruction. My surgeon's preference was to wait for 12 months which I was really happy with as I was very far from sure what I wanted to do whereas others have been really keen to have a mastectomy and reconstruction done together. For many reconstruction is an essential part of the recovery process. Find out what your options are first. In some cases, waiting until you are quite sure and have experienced staying flat may not limit your choices, but sometimes it might. Some processes are quite lengthy, so you need to consider time, discomfort and finances. But being content with the final choice is the most important thing - the experiences of others may inform you, but only you deep down will know what's right for you. Best wishes. 
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    I knew I didn't want to be flat. It was based on self knowledge and gut instinct. Having the belly for it, I went with a DIEP recon after a double mastectomy. It is a long recovery, three months to get properly back up to speed. I have no regrets. It is good to have my own warm flesh jiggling round on my chest. They're not breasts, but they fill my clothes, make me feel more 'normal' and give my husband something to squeeze! I know I would have got used to being flat, and I think it can be very strong and powerful, but I knew it wasn't me. K xox
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,961
    I'm still on the fence, too @MaryB83 - and may possibly always be.  I'm also mono boobed and have been since January 2018.  It doesn't thrill me but the thought of the surgery is still psychologically too much for me (and the time off work that it would need is financially too much for me).  If someone could wave a magic wand that would be fine but as it is, I'm still undecided.  I can't say that I love being half flat.  I get annoyed by the prosthesis, how high the bras sit and my inability to wear a lot of necklines but there you go.
  • Deanne
    Deanne Member Posts: 2,163
    It has been almost 6 years since my single mastectomy. At first, if I could have, I wanted immediate reconstruction. But after living with one boob through chemo and then radiotherapy, I had wavered on the idea. My surgeon was always clear that it could happen if I wanted but as time passed I became quite happy with life with an external prosthesis.

    I honestly don’t even think about it most of the time. I lead a full and active life and it is never a problem. I am a C cup and wear a sports bra with a swim prosthesis most of the time. But I do have a proper prosthesis and some nice mastectomy bras if I want to wear them too. I have never found it hot or uncomfortable and it does not overly restrict my clothing choices. 

    I guess for me it was the unknown of how reconstruction might turn out. There are risks with any surgery and since I had found life with one boob ok I decided to stay with what was perfectly liveable for me. It is a very personal decision and everyone has a different set of circumstances to consider. The important thing is to understand your choices and then make the best decision for you. Take care and wishing you all the best with your decision. 
  • JennyD78
    JennyD78 Member Posts: 69
    I had a bilateral mastectomy (one side preventative) and decided to stay flat and haven't looked back.  In a way I think I was lucky because I did neoadjuvant chemo so had 6 months to have a good think about what decision I would make.  I had E cup breasts before and the joy of not having to wear underwire ever again is immense...as is no boob sweat!  lol.  It's such a personal choice that neither is wrong, and you can change your mind so neither choice is permanent either.  Best of luck making your decision :)
  • Silba
    Silba Member Posts: 115
     I had a bilateral mastectomy called "Goldilocks"( new procedure ) , it doesn't leave you flat , probably an "A" cup and I am not going to have reconstruction done.

      I went from DD to this small ' model looks boobs" as my husband calls them ( no nipples) but apparently not many surgeon do it, so you have to talk with your one if he is familiar with it .

    Good luck .
  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,374
    That was really interesting @silba I do warn anyone else who googles that some of the images in the top few listings are very graphic, so don't do it if you are squeamish.
    Still, it looks like an alternative option that I may well of considered, if it had been offered.
  • BlackWidow
    BlackWidow Member Posts: 268
    Hello @MaryB83

    Like @Sister I have the one boob, do not want further surgery unless necessary and get by with the prosthesis.   I hate my look when naked and wish I had been given reconstruction options at the time.
    There are many thoughts from ladies of all ages and circumstances and you need to talk to as many as you can and have ''deep and meaningfuls'' with your medical team as some things may outweigh others in your specific case.  Ask ask ask.  Don't leave any appointments until you feel you have your answers.  Have no regrets.
    If I'd known, I would have opted for flat rather than being lopsided.
    If I'd been younger and fit enough to cope with long surgery I would have had a double DIEP as the thought of something fake inside me just did not appeal.
    In the end, are your breasts very important to you ?  If so, then you may have your answer.
    Your specific case - the type of BC, your follow-up treatment schedule, your age, finance and your circumstances all play a part in the decision.
    All the best.
    Anne
  • SoldierCrab
    SoldierCrab Member Posts: 3,429
    I love being flat :) 7  years since double mastectomy 
  • LMK74
    LMK74 Member Posts: 795
    I have one boob and while I wish I didn't the thought of more surgery was what made my choice. 2 years this August since I lost my boob. I do hate that some clothing is no longer suitable and wish I didn't have to screw around with a prosthetic but for now I feel I've made the right choice. 
  • SoldierCrab
    SoldierCrab Member Posts: 3,429
    edited April 2019
    @MaryB83
    another group if you are interested is this one https://www.facebook.com/groups/bcnoffaaduaustralia/

    Breast Cancer & Beyond- No recon, Flat, foobs and alive Down Under (Aust)

    Closed groupThis closed group is for anyone who has undergone a mastectomy and is now learning to live with
    NO reconstruction, or chose to wear foobs.
    did you choose not to have reconstruction?
    did you have to reverse your reconstruction?
    are you contemplating it?)

    Whatever the case, we would love to see you here
    Many of us can understand the day to day issues unique to living without reconstruction following mastectomy, in Australia. We can figure it out together.

    So feel free to open up and have a vent or express yourselves in any way you need to! We do not judge or discriminate! We believe in embracing each other and accepting each other's differences! No matter what!

    You need information about services or where to go for foobs etc just ask.