Contemplating the future!

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KatherineH
KatherineH Member Posts: 25
edited August 2017 in Day to day
Hello Lovelies,

im thinking about work and life after this horrible nightmare that is Breast Cancer, Chemotherapy and Radiotherapy and wanted to know what everyone did post treatment.

did you go back to the same job? Or start fresh somewhere else?

did you take time off?

feeling lost!  At the moment I'm going through the motions of life but feel useless.
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  • EarthWalkerLisha
    EarthWalkerLisha Member Posts: 74
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    Hi @KatherineH It's been a year since I was diagnosed and had surgery.  I was a mum at home before bc and am now contemplating entering the workforce again. I'm 47. My mind feels like it's in the right place but my body isn't.  I just wanted to move on, move forward and put bc behind me. It's going to be a longer, slower process and I'm feeling a little useless as my body is going through some side effects from chemo, radiation and now hormone supressing therapy, as well as prior thyroid issues.  So I'm just going to try and be easy on myself.  Still a little lost myself.  Lisha xx
  • Romla
    Romla Member Posts: 2,092
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    I am retired and have teenagers still at home so pretty busy juggling their stuff. Did feel lost after radiotherapy finished as was intense and busy period from initial diagnosis to surgeries and then radiotherapy. Fell in a bit of a hole afterwards partially as very tired but luckily had a couple of friends who got me going again looking outwards esp for fellow bc people. Found this site , a local bc support group and a some help thru Cancer Council to connect with someone who had been thru similar. Mainly I needed to know my life was not over by seeing and hearing from other bc ladies.I do a bit of volunteer work and make a point to get out and about for a cuppa with people.Not sure if answers your question but basically picked up life pre bc and added exercise and new people who had gone thru bc too. Because of all the treatment have finally recognised I need to take things more slowlyplus I do not need to be quite as busy as am a retiree  - learning to prioritise better might be a good outcome from the bc experience for me . All the best - always someone happy to chat and share XO
  • Afraser
    Afraser Member Posts: 4,371
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    We are all different. Our diagnoses are different, treatment can be different and what helps us along will be different too. So while it's useful to know what other people have done, following your strongly felt instincts is pretty good too. My instincts said keep doing what you are doing. I went back to work after surgery (mastectomy, no reconstruction) and stayed working through chemo and herceptin. I am still on hormonal treatment. I had no nausea and fatigue from chemo and though I had other side effects, they didn't affect my working. I changed job a year later, when I felt comfortable that I was over active treatment and sure about making a change. It's not a model, just one person's story. Working kept me grounded, but it doesn't help everyone. Don't rush, you'll know what's best for you when you get there, best wishes.
  • Glemmis
    Glemmis Member Posts: 343
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    I was back at work too after mastectomy & lump node clearance. I had 10 days off. Worked through chemo & radio but it is only now I feel like I want to give up & have a rest. It kept me distracted through treatment but some people like to take that time to recover.  Take it easy & find something you enjoy doing, best of luck!
  • fairydust
    fairydust Member Posts: 290
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    Over and over again I have been told post treatment is a difficult period. I wonder whether it is the build up of chemicals in our bodies and the effects of radiation.  My radiation oncolgist told me it would take a while to be clear of fatigue and side effects.
     My psychologist only saw her briefly stated she has many patients coming post cancer it is common to get down. Finally my naturopath said post cancer now was the time for healing and restoring the body. 
    I am now 5 months post treatment my energy levels are picking up but am I back to normal.....not yet 
    I know we are all different but consistently on this site most of us take a while to become whole again.  WE do eventually.

  • Unicornkisses
    Unicornkisses Member Posts: 402
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    I am a self employed Dog Groomer with my own business (sole trader, no employees) so I have been working a little when I can through the last 7 months of treatment.
    Fortunately I have been running for 17 years and have a loyal group of clients who are prepared to work around me and a husband with a reasonably well paying job and a flexible employer.
    I was not able to work much during chemo, especially as I spent part of the time in hospital, and have had two operations so far.
    I am 57.
    We can't afford for me not to work, at least part time, if we want to continue with the lifestyle we are accustomed to and support my horse and my husband's travel aspirations.

    I have learnt through all this that I was not focussed enough in what was good for me, and put the business first too much.
    I am not trained for much else and live in a high unemployment region, so doubt that I will consider changing vocation, but I believe many people reassess what they want to do with their lives after cancer treatment and go a completely different direction.
    I will just cut back a little on my work load, not be pressured into accepting more each day than I can manage and will be choosier about who I accept.
    I will also schedule in a proper lunch time and time for regular exercise and catching up with friends.

    I felt I was cruising slowly before and taking a lot for granted.
    Now I feel compelled to get into gear and make things happen.
    The goals I had for my riding, getting fit, getting out and competing, going to events just to enjoy watching them. 
    Improving my work / life balance.

    Perhaps I feel more urgency now, and a renewed interest in life.
    I don't really want to go back completely to what was "normal" before, I want this year to have meant something, and to have had a positive effect on my life in some way.

    Good luck finding your answers, they will probably become clearer as you go along. Jennie
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,552
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    @Zoffiel
    Oh, Batchelor subjects?  sounds interesting - typo no doubt!  Enjoy the Otis Retreat!
  • bron66
    bron66 Member Posts: 2
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    My bc treatment  commenced in January and finished 4 weeks ago . I am 50 and have three teenagers , l had a stressful job , both physically and mentally and a very busy life . Everything has changed for me . I worked post surgery for a couple of weeks and then I had to stop during chemo. I found it debilitating and radiotherapy just exacerbated my side effects and fatigue . I have not worked since and like Katherine , I am really contemplating my life and where to from here . I have decided that I no longer want to live the life I was prior to bc that was so stressful and so busy  . Financially it has been incredibly difficult , watching us go backwards but have decided that my health is more important and my recovery is paramount to future health. At times I feel guilty for not returning to work especially when I hear of others who have continued to work throughout treatment .. no way would I have been able to but I often think if others can shouldn't I ?? . One month post completion and I'm still so so tired . I have joint pains and aches that never existed prior to chemo , I'm just not my old self . I was active fit and healthy !! I feel like it has all taken its toll on my body and wonder when it will recover .l can't see myself returning to my position in the next few months .. is this normal ??  Much time contemplating new careers , much time hoping that I use this experience to make changes to bring peace into my new life . 
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
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    I'd just changed jobs before diagnosis,  only been there about 5 months and it was a job I loved with much less stress than my old job. I couldn't work during chemo and it was 7 weeks before I felt ready to try. I initially went back on half time and it took about 8 weeks before I felt I could increase..I did this slowly...going up by 1 hour a day at a time. I sat on 32 hours with a mid week break for 3 months before my last push to full time. It took me 9 months to get there. I am still trying to recover my exercise fitness on top of my work day now so going to do the YWCA encore program again to get me back on the path. Kath x
  • wendy55
    wendy55 Member Posts: 774
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    I dont work anymore so cant say anything on that subject, just wanted to say to you AMAZING ladies what a ride its been for you all and I am inspired by all of your comments,you have not let  breast cancer define you but rather it has strengthened you when you probably thought that there was no petrol left in your tank!! I hope that all of your family, partners and friends are, and especially yourselves  very proud of what you have achieved.The world is your oyster ladies, ENJOY,
    wendy55
  • kezmusc
    kezmusc Member Posts: 1,544
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    Hey Katherine,

    As all the other lovely ladies have said, like everything while navigating through this, it's whatever you feel you should be doing.
    Personally I am 45 have 4 teenage daughters living at home a part time job and a home business.  My personal goal was to come out of this mess looking and feeling the same as before BC.  Basically to keep my life as normal as possible.

    We were really busy as a family at that time too with my twin daughters 18th birthday 3 days after my diagnoses, sons 21st 2 days before surgery, a formal , a graduation, christmas and another milestone birthday.  I didn't know how I was going to get through it but we ended up having a fantastic time at all the events.  There was a no BC talk ban put on at all those times by myself.

    I took two months off work after surgery and did what I could on the farm business.  I found whilst fixing fences, playing with horses etc a lot of the time I could just forget what was going on.
    I went back to work two days a week after my first round of chemo.  I used the cold cap so kept my hair, nobody that I didn't want to know knew what was going on.  I was just me at work. Round 4 of the AC knocked me around for about 10 days but I was able to work all through the 12 weekly doses of paclitaxel.  That, however, made me super sensitive to sunlight so working outside was a no go, so I decided to renovate my dining room instead. 

    Having projects along the way really helped me and the exercise sanding walls, painting etc strengthened my arm back to normal,  I also found while I was busy I didn't get tired which I though was a bit weird but it worked.

    I finished radiation about two weeks ago and am back on track just doing what I've always done but taking a little more time than I once would have appreciating the small things.  I am not really the sort of person to make drastic changes but I do find myself saying yes to oportunities and invitations a lot more than before.
    All the best
    xoxoxo
  • cranky_granny
    cranky_granny Member Posts: 702
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    Just found this after my rant elsewhere. It's great to read yet again I'm not alone. might not give me a solution yet. But there's hope.