remembering when my doctor diagnosed me :(
Is it strange to keep remembering the moment when you are diagnosed??? I do EVERY SINGLE DAY and it makes me sad and brings me to tears... I still think that it was yesterday that he sat me down and looked at me with his sad eyes. "joanne, it's not good news. Its cancer..." I remember my brain instantly shutting off and he continued to talk but all I heard was "blah blah blah blah." I was diagnosed on 14th April this year (2011) i remember my mum that was next to me grabbing me and crying saying, "why? my baby my baby." I then had to ACT as if I was even listening to him.....thinking one thing-am i gonna die?....I then called my loving fiance to tell him....he could tell in my voice that something was wrong..I didnt want to tell him over the phone but he wouldnt hang up...his reaction...crying...devastation.. and then I got off the phone..how am i gonna break the news to my sister whos going thru enuf of her problems? Im her baby sister. how is she gonna take it? and then work? I just got promoted!!! I then called work and of all things apologised for not coming in that day haha (I went in the next few days as I in shock) but they thought I was loony even then lol! and then how am I gonna tell my dad..
I remember this every single day! its as if my brain thinks its not real. sorry to vent!
This was the first of the bad news that continued to happen to me for a while. As I was warned its gonna a journey.... any ways now ive brought myself to tears and I need to stop but thank you beautiful people for reading