Is this really happening? When do I wake up?

Nadi

It has been eight days since I found a lump in my breast and my world has not stopped spinning. My GP (breast cancer survivor herself) was on it so fast. Mammogram, ultrasound, core needle biopsy, bone scan, CT scan, positive pathology result confirming breast cancer, package from BCNA and appointment booked with surgeon for next week - all in the last 3 days!!! I feel like I can't catch my breath. Doing this alone as hubby is with family after death of his father from Melanoma (same day as my diagnosis). Tough week.  Will things always be moving this fast? Think I had my first panic attack ever last night. 

 

lisboy

Hi Nadi

So sorry you are going through this. The first days and weeks are a roller coaster as you get tested and wait for results. They move quickly once the bc is confirmed. It does settle down somewhat  once you have your treatment plan and know exactly what you are dealing with. It sounds like you have a great team who are onto treatment fast. Sorry that you are also having to deal with the loss of your father in law. All the best with the surgery appointment. Keep posting here, the community is a great place to be when you have questions or need some support.

Lisa xx

Robyn W

Hello Nadi:)I had exactly the same as you 2 years ago this month! My husband was overseas when I was diagnosed.The first couple of weeks are a real blur,but as soon as you have had your appointment with the surgeon,you will find that things settle down.You will most likely be given a date for surgery,and in my case it was about 2 weeks after my appointment. I found that this time gave me some breathing space after the initial shock.I had a mastectomy followed by chemo,and now I am on  Tamoxifen.I have never felt better in my life:) Try to remember that breast cancer these days ,in most cases,is very treatable.Stay connected on here ,as you won't find a better place for help,advice and just general support.There is someone here 24/7. Take each day as it comes,and DONT look ahead.You can do this!! Cheers Robyn xox

Linda_touwen

Hi Nadi

I can totally relate to how you are feeling. I found my lump only 6 weeks ago. Within a week I was diagnosed, within 2 weeks I had had my surgery, a week after that I had my portacath surgery for chemo/herceptin, this week I met my oncologist and have CT, bone and heart scans lined up, and next week I start over 15 months of treatment. It has been an absolute blur and I can barely keep up.

The advice i've been given, that seems to work, is to try and take one day/step at a time. Don't get ahead of yourself. Don't google anything - come to this site or ask your doctor/nurse. Always take someone with you to appointments. Write down your questions. Have faith in your medical team.

Panic attacks are something I have been introduced to through all this too. They are absolutely awful.

I'm so sorry that this is happening to you - especially with everything that is going on in your life. There is never a good time for breast cancer. I have found this site wonderful - it's so good to know that i'm not the only one going through this awful experience and you can almost be guaranteed that someone has asked your questions here before.

Best wishes with everything! Don't hesitate to reach out if you need help.

Linda xx

Nadi

Thanks Lisa. It's great to know that there are communities like this! I think it will be great to be able to talk to other women who have gone or are going through what I am experiencing. Even hearing that it settles down after a treatment plan is agreed, makes me feel better. Thanks Nadine

Nadi

Thanks Robyn. I was just thinking to myself last night that I don't think I can do this - especially the surgery part even if it's not a mastectomy. But after reading posts here, I can see that many many women have done it, are doing it and while I probably won't like it, I have no choice but to do it too. I am glad to hear that you are feeling great! Take care Nadine

 

Nadi

Thanks Linda. I think I am going to have to force myself to take your very good advice. I am a planner and like to have lots of variables thought out in advance so I feel in control. I don't think that's going to work this time. I will just have to give myself permission to go with the flow and put faith in my medical team. Hope all goes well for you. Nadine

rowdy

Hi welcome to the site the ladies have said it all 1 day at a time.

I found having a diary helped knowing what was helpfull to keep track of what was next Take care and be kind to yourself it can be a long trip. Order your my journey kit if you haven't yet.x

Flutter By

Hey Nadi, first a big hug, I'm sorry for the loss of your father in law and that your now on this roller coaster, having your hubby away at this time makes it harder for you.

it will settle down, things won't move so fast and you will eventually process it all, all those unknown answers to your questions slowly get answers, like the other lady's have said one step at a time, focus on getting thru surgery then tackle the next step.

i felt the same as you on diagnosis, my head was spinning, I literally had got the all clear from cervical cancer surgery then 5 days later was diagnosed with breast cancer, I felt like having a tantrum! It was a blur for the next two weeks, trying to get my head around it all, but I did get thru those initial weeks and so will you!

hang in there, use every support available to you, I hope surgery goes well for you xxx

[Deleted User]

Hi Nadi, what an awful week for you. Time to stop, take a deep breath, cuddle your husband and family, and take time to discuss how you are all feeling. It is a big whirlwind when you get a diagnosis, and it's particularly bigger pressure with your father in laws passing. Take it 1 day at a time, 1 appointment at a time. I used to write all my questions down on a notepad to take into each appointment. Did this, as I could refer back to my notes when not so overwhelmed by all the goings on during your appointments and treatments. Take a support person with you, as they may hear something that you miss, and can be there for you if you are teary. Sending you a big cuddle, and wishing you all the best for your surgery, Trace ??????

Doll

Hi Nadine,

Is this really happening? When do I wake up? is a sentiment I read here often.  I'm sorry that you have to go through this.  I have found it reassuring to read other peoples stories and I hope you do too.  Such strong capable women.  It is 14 weeks since my diagnosis.  Like you I didn't think I could do it. First the surgery, then when i was told i would need chemotherapy, and radiotherapy, and targeted therapy with herceptin.  But I got through the mastectomy and reconstruction and 3 cycles of chemo so far.  Getting easier each time (mostly due I think to exercise- there is evidence that  exercise can help with the side effects of chemo but that's another post). Sometimes I still doubt whether I can get through this but then as the others have said take one day at a time.  Be kind to yourself, accept help and support and ask lots of questions.  Doll

Nadi

Thanks Doll. All these stories are helping me to be really positive. I went back to work today after having 2 days off for more tests and I felt really positive after reading stories of the ladies here. First thing I did when I sat down was to convince my workplace have a breast cancer awareness morning tea. I am feeling a lot more positive thanks to all these comments and encouragement I have received. Thank you for reaching out and good luck with your treatment. Nadine

Nadi

Thanks Rowdy, After you suggestion I started a diary today to keep track. Just organising things in this way makes me feel a little bit in control. Cheers Nadine

Nadi

OMGosh Flutter what a load of things to deal with. Hope all is well with you. Nadine

Nadi

Thanks Tracey. After I read your post I contacted a friend and asked her to be my support person for my meeting not with the doctor but with HR at work tomorrow. I feel so much better now that I don't have to think of a tonne of questions on my own. It actually felt good and reassuring reaching out like that so thanks for the suggestion. I am glad that hubby is coming home early to meet the surgeon with me next week. Thanks for the cuddle!!!

Alsopt

Hey Nadi it's a crap road please be assured that this site is very good look I was very shocked I still can't believe it but I've done lumpectomy mastectomy expansion and 4 Red Devils now 3 months of taxol chemo 3 months of radio then whatever all my love I've met many people on this site they give us strength please keep sharing your not alone and that's what bc does it isolates but there is so many survivors in your darkest days share share share xxxx