Just been diagnosed - scared..

Sweetsomethings
Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7
edited February 2018 in Newly diagnosed
You hear of this daily, but when it hits home, my gosh, your whole world feels dark! 
I have just been diagnosed with breast cancer and am shocked scared angry. I feel violated. Have lots of support but still feel lonely. Horrible horrible feeling. Grade 1. Seeing my breast surgeon on Wednesday and am so so worried and scared. I just want to hurry along and get the process started. Love to you all going through this...
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Comments

  • BlackWidow
    BlackWidow Member Posts: 268
    Hello to another newbie.  I was diagnosed before Christmas and am waiting for my treatment plan as well.  Good luck as you travel this awful BC road.  I just joined a local support group which has really helped me.  Is there one in your area ?
  • Afraser
    Afraser Member Posts: 4,352
    Welcome to the group no-one wants to join! But you are genuinely welcome and I hope you find it helpful. In a hurry to start is no bad thing, sooner started, sooner you can get to the end of treatment. But waiting is a frequent part of the process, so being prepared for that too may also help. Once you know what the next steps are, you have something real in all this confusion to focus on. If you have to be in this at all, grade 1 is a good start. But treatment varies because cancers vary widely. Don't hesitate to ask questions - with your surgeon, oncologist in due course, here. Take someone with you for important discussions, at least at first - shock, anger are natural reactions but not the best state of mind to be taking careful notes or remembering queries. Take things one at a time if you can, don't expend energy on things that may never happen. Remember that the longest journey can be achieved one step at a time. You are already on your way! Best wishes. 
  • Sweetsomethings
    Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7


    Hello to another newbie.  I was diagnosed before Christmas and am waiting for my treatment plan as well.  Good luck as you travel this awful BC road.  I just joined a local support group which has really helped me.  Is there one in your area ?

    Thank you for your message. This is the first place I have looked at joined as my sister had told me about it. I will do some research and see what there is in my area. Thank you again and Good Luck in your journey.
  • Sweetsomethings
    Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7

    Afraser said:

    Welcome to the group no-one wants to join! But you are genuinely welcome and I hope you find it helpful. In a hurry to start is no bad thing, sooner started, sooner you can get to the end of treatment. But waiting is a frequent part of the process, so being prepared for that too may also help. Once you know what the next steps are, you have something real in all this confusion to focus on. If you have to be in this at all, grade 1 is a good start. But treatment varies because cancers vary widely. Don't hesitate to ask questions - with your surgeon, oncologist in due course, here. Take someone with you for important discussions, at least at first - shock, anger are natural reactions but not the best state of mind to be taking careful notes or remembering queries. Take things one at a time if you can, don't expend energy on things that may never happen. Remember that the longest journey can be achieved one step at a time. You are already on your way! Best wishes. 

    Thank you AFraser. Your words are comforting. It’s just so overwhelming having to digest everything. Will keep you posted.
  • Sweetsomethings
    Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7
    Thank you AFraser. Your words are comforting. It’s just so overwhelming having to digest it all. Will keep you posted.
  • Sweetsomethings
    Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7


    Hello to another newbie.  I was diagnosed before Christmas and am waiting for my treatment plan as well.  Good luck as you travel this awful BC road.  I just joined a local support group which has really helped me.  Is there one in your area ?

  • Sweetsomethings
    Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7
    Hi BlackWidow. It’s so daunting. The wait is so long..
    There are so many things going through my head!! 
    I will do some research and look into seeing what is available in my area - thank you.
     Are you going through private or public? 
  • Mollygirl
    Mollygirl Member Posts: 213
    Hi @Sweetsomethings, welcome but I'm so sorry you have join us. 
    Initial diagnosis is a shock to say the least and everything seems insurmountable and overwhelming. 
    Once you've seen your 'team' you will feel a little better with a clear path of treatment whatever that may be. 
    Your team are there for you. Ask lots of questions, be honest about how you're feeling. They will help you deal with the huge amount of information you're given and the tidal wave of emotions you'll experience. If you can take someone to your appointments - it's hard to 'hear' everything when you're under such stress. 
    We too, are here for you. Everyone's experience and cancer is different so we have a wealth of tips, tricks and hugs to share. 
    Deep breath @Sweetsomethings, we got you. 
    Biggest hugs,Bec xx
  • SoldierCrab
    SoldierCrab Member Posts: 3,445
    hi @Sweetsomethings

    Below are a couple of links to help you find your
    way around the forum and also how to find a breast care nurse and how to order
    a MY journey Kit if you haven't got one yet. 



    It can be a a whirlwind when we first get a
    diagnosed.... Breathe and take it one step at a time. 



    The what and how thread.

    http://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/14879/the-what-and-how-thread/p1 

    Breast Care Nurses

    https://www.mcgrathfoundation.com.au/OurMission/OurNurses/FindANurse.aspx 

    My Journey Kits and other
    resources. 

    https://www.bcna.org.au/resources/

    BCNA Helpline 1800 500 258

    If you have any questions, concerns or require any further information
    or support please call 1800 500 258.  The Helpline is open Monday,
    Wednesday and Friday from 9 am till 5 pm EST and Tuesday and Thursday from 9 am
    till 9 pm EST.

  • onemargie
    onemargie Member Posts: 1,264
    Hi there @Sweetsomethings welcome to the forum. Sorry you’ve had to join us but It will be a great resource for you with real advice from real people.  It’s always daunting when you first get diagnosed. I was triple negative. Stage 2a grade 3. And it was the scariest bloody thing ever. It’s so good you have been diagnosed so early too. My best advice is take each day at a time take advice from your team, but listen to your guts too, and try not to google anything, everyone on here has a different story to tell and advice to give and all have had all different treatments and meds etc. once you have a plan of attack it will feel better. Rest assured you’ve got this. Big hug. Keep us posted. Margie xx
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,521
    @Sweetsomethings  Welcome (sort of!) to the BC Club ...... none of us asked to be here - but you've found the best support group on the web!  Try not to google too much - until you've see the surgeon - it can only confuse things.

    So it is Thurs today & you've now seen your surgeon & will have an idea of the timeframe  for surgery etc.  

    Buckle up your seat belt ..... it is a crazy sort of ride!  Like you, I wanted it all to happen fast & get it over with - and have been very lucky!  Diagnosed on Jan 5th, saw the surgeon on Jan 15th, surgery on Jan 17th.  I will be starting radiation Feb 28th - and it should be 'all over' by March 30th (tho I may go on tablets as well afterwards!)

    I've had a few 'melt downs' along the way - which is totally normal .... but I have some amazing friends & family who've helped me thru this so far - many of whom have also had BC & have happily answered all my questions and calmed me down!  One, I call my 'guardian angel' and she is just wonderful. She had a full mastectomy 5 years ago & has helped me SO much, even tho she lives in Qld & I am in NSW.   

    You DON'T have to tell EVERYONE you know about this - even some family members!  Tell your closest friends & family (that you really care about) and they will be your main support base.  Not all your friends will know how to react - they may take their cue from you?  I was very up front with my friends & family & found that it has helped big time. I've kept doing my normal activities unless I have a medical appointment.

    You sound like a glass Half Full person - keep that optimism going!   I didn't 'feel ill' - I didn't 'look ill' - I had a 'condition' and it was removed ..... anything else from now on is 'mopping up'.  

    Don't let this 'define you'!  When it is 'over - it is OVER!  Just yearly checkups.

    With a bit of luck - you'll get away with a Lumpectomy & maybe Radiation as a 'mop up' - as a Grade 1 you may not even need Radiation!  Mine was a Grade 2 Invasive Lobular Carcinoma - and all pathology & nodes were clear - but radiation recommended as it is an 'aggressive one' - even tho bits were 'clear' ..... with me, there may be the odd 'random' in the rest of the breast tissue.  SO - I will be doing radiation soon!

    I have minimal scarring - I was AMAZED!

    I hope you are happy with your first visit to the surgeon - and I hope that your journey continues smoothly. xxx


  • Sweetsomethings
    Sweetsomethings Member Posts: 7
    edited February 2018
    Thanking you all for your comforting words. I seen the surgeon, and received positive news, though I’m still scared...the waiting game is a killer. I wish I could keep typing to update you with more but I am mentally drained and sooo exhausted. As I’m sure you all will understand. Love to each and every one of you.
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Welcome to the forum.  I feel like I've been on it forever but was only diagnosed in December!  You will find out so much information, and get so much support from the women here.  At the start, it just seems so overwhelming and you just want it OUT.  Try to avoid Dr Google but there are some reputable cancer sites out there.  Write down the questions you have for you doctors.  I found it easiest to tell family and a couple of key friends to let others know (and to pass on that I wasn't up for visits and phone calls all of the time).  I also started a blog and gave out the address to those interested so that they could keep up to date with what was going on with me without having to call me.  Lots has been communicated with texts and emails, which means you deal with it when you feel like dealing with it.  No point having distracted yourself for 5 minutes just to get a well-meaning phone call.  Good luck.
  • adean
    adean Member Posts: 1,036
    Hi there lm 6 years post diagnosis but l will never forget that day.you have breast cancer.l have changed yes, and for me it will always be part of me. Its made me the person l am today and l like me! Ive made some amazing friends. My only advice is be kind to yourself. We spend so much time worrying about the impact on everyone else we forget us. Adean xxx